


If You Asked

by Lilly_C



Category: Killer Instinct (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Post Series, Romance, episode based
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-05-28
Updated: 2008-05-28
Packaged: 2017-12-21 16:26:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/902400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilly_C/pseuds/Lilly_C
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I’d be here close when you need it most.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If You Asked

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks, appreciation and love goes out to firthy and chris4short for doing beta for me, and chris4short (yes again) for letting me use Bellows Grove Hospital as the name of my rehab center, naughtyd0g for the maths help, and a_phoenixdragon for the advice. Much appreciated people.
> 
> Also have to give some thanks and a whole lotta love to Spike for putting up with me while I was working on this and also for helping me with some of the scenes and one-liners, shame I couldn't work with some of your other suggestions. There's always other fics, baby. Thank you so much for yet again letting me use your creation 'The Gallant And The Magnificent'. Always my number one smile. I love you, Lilly :)
> 
> The opening sequence is taken from an earlier work of mine called Promise.
> 
> All events within this story take place after the end of the episode Fifteen Minutes Of Flame, which was also the series finale. There are very minor references to the episodes Forget Me Not, Shake Rattle and Roll, She’s The Bomb and Love Hurts.
> 
> A lot of research on drug addiction, and rehabilitation from drug addiction has gone into this story. I decided on cocaine addiction. I researched the early stages of cocaine addiction, the later stages of the addiction as well as the ways to tell when someone is high on the drug. I looked up the various stages of cold turkey and several drug rehabilitation techniques. I also did a little research on eating disorders. I also tried to find out if there were any rehab facilities that were just for police officers and there are lots of them, but most are for alcohol related addiction problems. I visited several drug information sites, and read the books This Is Cocaine by Nick Constable and Real Life Issues: Addictions by Stephen Briggs and I also visited BEAT a UK/EU based eating disorder charity information site.
> 
> The rehab facility that features in this story is wholly fictional although I have based it in the Parkside district/area of San Francisco. The nightclub and bar that feature in this story are wholly fictional although I have based them in the Telegraph Hill district/area of San Francisco. The hospital that features in this story is wholly fictional although I have based it in the Forest Hill district/area of San Francisco.
> 
> I believe in the theory that everyone, even those who don’t like music or find it important has at least one song that is either their favorite or that gets them through some real rough times and is special to them. I picked Sweet Surrender by Sarah McLachlan as the song that gets Danielle through the aftermath of her ordeal and that it also helps her get through rehab as well as making her realize that Jack is the only one who truly understands her and everything that she’s experienced while working with him at DCU {Deviant Crime Unit}. Music is important to Danielle because she has an ipod (Who’s Your Daddy) and plays guitar (While You Were Sleeping).
> 
> The songs If You Asked by Longview, Fall To Pieces by Velvet Revolver and Sweet Surrender by Sarah McLachlan, and I’m just borrowing them for this story. The lyrics are indicated in italics.
> 
> I’ve borrowed four quotes, one from the movie 28 Days, one from the movie Mindhunters, one from the Cold Case episode "Lonely Hearts" (season four) and one from the musician Dave Rowntree. The quotes are indicated in italics.
> 
> If you think this work may trigger you in any way stop here, otherwise continue on.

Danielle clicked the safety off as she calmly stood in front of John Walker. Her gun was aimed at his groin. 

"Shame no one will see this," Danielle mused.

"These guys will."

"Yeah, and?"

"I'll claim brutality," John threatened.

Danielle pulled the trigger twice in quick succession. "FUCK YOU!" she snarled.

"Bitch," John whimpered as blood and urine quickly covered his pants.

Danielle smiled triumphantly. "Just keeping my promise," she said as she handed Jack’s gun back to him.

Ray turned and watched Danielle as she made her way towards Jack’s car, noticing as she wiped tears away with the back of her hand.

Danielle got into Jack's car locking the doors; she turned the radio on, twisting the dial until she had her favorite station. She amplified the volume when one of her favorite songs was on. She started mumbling the words. "Every time I'm falling down. All alone I fall to pieces."

Jack sighed. "They’ve taken him to San Francisco General for treatment, and from there he’ll be transferred to Oakland for questioning."

"Good," Ray nodded.

Jack looked at his car; he noticed that the radio was blaring and Danielle had her feet up on the dashboard. She was sobbing uncontrollably, mumbling something under her breath. "She's not gonna be able to deal with this," Jack admitted, concerned.

"I hope you're wrong, man," Ray said.

Jack was still watching her as she rubbed her eyes to try and stop the freely flowing tears. "When do you want her to see the department shrink?" he asked.

"I'll deal with that. Take her home Jack and don’t try anything. Right now she just needs a friend."

Jack smiled. "I understand."

Jack slowly walked towards his car, the radio was still blaring; he knocked loudly on the window when he couldn’t open the door. Danielle leaned across, pulling the lock up on the driver’s side. He got in, closing the door. 

"Lock it," Danielle demanded as she collapsed against him violently sobbing, mumbling incoherently. As he tried reaching across to lower the radio, Danielle grabbed his wrist. "Leave it," she said faintly.

Jack wiped tears from Danielle’s cheeks. "I'm taking you home," he insisted.

Danielle began trembling at the thought. "I'm not going home, Jack," she snapped.

"Oh, okay so where are you going?" he calmly questioned her.

"I don’t care where I go," she gravely replied.

Jack smiled tenderly at her. "How does my place sound?"

Danielle lifted her head from the curve of his neck. "Yeah whatever," she starkly answered.

Jack turned the engine on, speedily leaving the pier.

*

Danielle got of out the car, walking nervously to the door. "Fucking hell," she gasped, as she opened the door and the dog came running out.

Jack looked at the dog and back at Danielle. "It's not your fault boy," he said has he gently stroked him.

Danielle tossed her coat onto the armchair as she headed to the fridge for a beer, taking two swift swigs. She felt bile rising in her throat, placing the bottle on the counter she sprinted upstairs to the bathroom, slamming the door.

Jack heard the door slam as he entered, quickly making his way upstairs. He listened to Danielle retching for a moment before going in. He sat next to her, holding her while she continued throwing up.

Danielle wiped her mouth on a bath towel as her stomach finally settled down. She leaned against the side of the bath for support, shooting Jack an apologetic look. "I missed first time," she sniffled.

"It doesn't matter," Jack said as he continued to hold her in silence.

A few moments passed when Danielle broke the silence. "I think I'm ready to get up." Jack got up first, holding her arms as he helped her to her feet. "Thanks Jack."

Jack found a t-shirt near the top of the laundry hamper. He noticed that she had a small smear of sick on her sweater. "Wear this; put your clothes in there I'll wash them."

Danielle quickly changed into Jack's t-shirt and went downstairs, immediately making herself comfortable on the couch. She picked up the remote and started channel hopping. "Oh, fuck no," she exclaimed as she came across Die Hard on one of the movie channels.

"What?"

"I am not watching Die Hard," she stated as she continued flicking before finally settling on a cartoon channel.

Danielle took the bottle of water from Jack as he settled down next to her. "Drink this, it'll help."

"Thanks Jack," she said as she took a mouthful.

Jack soothingly caressed her cheek. "You have don't have to thank me for anything Danni."

Danielle smiled affectionately at him. "You saved my life."

Jack chuckled faintly. "I do that for anyone."

Danielle was beginning to get bored of watching cartoons. "I'm off to bed," she said lightly as she delicately kissed him on the forehead.

 

An hour had passed when Jack looked at his watch, deciding that he should go up and check on Danielle. He quickly made his way upstairs, noticing that the bedroom lights were still on, and the door wide open. He heard Danielle weeping as he approached the bed. He sat on the bed instinctively pushing her hair away from her face, putting his arms around her. She shifted her position so her head was resting sluggishly on his lap. "Jack, don't take this the wrong way."

"What?"

"Will you sleep with me?" she asked cautiously.

"Danni, I'm not sure that's such a..." he stammered.

Danielle sighed dejectedly. "Not like that, Jack, just hold me until I wake up, if I get any sleep that is."

"All right," Jack said as he stood up, rapidly removing his jersey and jeans; he kept his vest and boxers on. He got into bed, drawing Danielle securely into his embrace, gently massaging her brow with his thumb as she gradually and quietly began drifting off to sleep.

 

Jack felt his cell phone vibrating beneath his pillow as the alarm beeped. "Is it morning already?" Danielle questioned sleepily.

"Yeah, at least you got some sleep," he softly answered.

Danielle smiled thankfully at him. "When did I finally get off?"

"Around two."

"Hate to ruin the moment, Jack."

"But."

"I need to go home and get ready for work."

"Are you sure that's such a good idea, Danni?"

"Yes, because I can make my statement and defend my actions."

Jack lightly kissed her forehead. "You don't have to defend your actions. It was the right thing to do."

"I don't think that the captain will see it like that," Danielle sighed remorsefully as she got out of bed.

*

"Jack, can you get my work clothes for me?" Danielle asked as she disappeared into the bathroom. Jack went into her bedroom, opening the closet he took out a green blouse and a pair of black slacks, placing them on the untidy bed. He went into the kitchen using the last of the bread to make breakfast for Danielle.

She turned the shower on, testing the temperature with the back of her hand; she climbed under it when it was just right.

A few minutes later Danielle came into the kitchen, she was drying her hair with a towel. "Have the other slice, Jack," she offered as she took a bite of toast. Jack quickly gobbled the toast. "You ready to go?" he asked as he wiped the crumbs and butter off his mouth.

"Yeah, can we go straight to work?"

"Sure, there's plenty of coffee at work anyway."

"Tastes like tar," Danielle quietly chuckled.

*

As Ray came back inside from his sneaky mid-morning cigarette break, he noticed that Jack had his arm around Danielle as they were signing in.

"Hale, Carter," he said loudly.

Jack walked towards their boss. "Sorry we're late sir," he said.

"It doesn't matter. I wasn't expecting either of you to come in today."

Danielle quickly joined with the two men. "I wanted to come in, sir," she said.

Ray shot her a puzzled look. "Why?"

"To make my witness statement, and defend my actions."

Ray sympathetically touched her arm. "Carter, you don't have to defend yourself."

"If its okay sir, I'd like to take Carter's statement," Jack said.

"That's for Carter to decide," Ray pointed out.

Danielle smiled sincerely at the men. "I want Jack to do it."

Ray was in the other room watching them through the one-way mirror. He couldn't help but notice the way Jack held her hand across the table, or how he smiled lovingly at her, reassuring her that everything was going to be all right when she felt that she couldn't continue with her statement.

Several hours had passed when they finally emerged from the interview room. 

"My office," Ray ordered. Danielle closed the door. "Jack, do you remember what I said to you on the pier?"

"About not trying anything because Carter needs a friend?" he asked knowingly.

"Yeah. So why is it Jack, you had your arm around her when you signed in, and you were holding her hand throughout the interview."

Danielle tried reassuring Ray. "Nothing happened, sir."

Ray directed a skeptical look at them. "You're both on leave for one week. I cleared it with the Captain."

"Thank you, sir," Danielle said as she followed Jack out.

Jack put his arm around Danielle as they made their way out of the office.

*

Danielle was sprawled out on the couch, she was wearing Jack's hoodie, and sweat pants. "I'll never see them again," he joked as he came downstairs.

"You will, eventually," Danielle smiled.

Jack sat next to her; she rested her head on his thigh as he stroked her hair. "Your work clothes are ironed and hanging up in the closet."

The dog lay down in front of the couch, ready for the late movie to start. "You’re all set for tomorrow?" Jack asked.

"Can't wait," Danielle responded enthusiastically.

"Good," he said as the movie started.

 

As the credits rolled, Jack noticed that Danielle had fallen asleep. He didn't want to wake her because she looked so serene, he didn't want to carry her upstairs either because he'd already tried that and she was a lot heavier than she looked. He got up and pulled the blanket over her, carefully placing a throw cushion beneath her head.

He collected up the empty beer bottles, depositing them in the recycling basket. He took another beer from the fridge, taking a nip as he sat down. He picked up the remote, lowering the volume looking for something else to watch.

*

Harry was loitering near the front desk when Jack and Danielle entered the building.

"Danielle," he beamed as he ran to her, hugging her tightly. "I missed you," he whispered. "I missed you too, Harry," she said thankfully, as they pulled away.

"Where's my hug, Harry?" Jack joked.

"Hi Jack," Harry said as he made his way back to the forensics lab.

"Somebody's happy," Jack retorted.

"Yeah, I guess he is," Danielle replied as they quickly made their way to Ray's office.

Jack closed the door and sat down.

Ray looked quizzically at Danielle. "Are you ready to return to work, Detective, or do you need more time off?"

Danielle smiled softly at her boss. "I'm fine sir; I just want to get back to normal."

"All right than," Ray said, satisfied with her answer.

Jack looked at Danielle, then at Ray. "What case are we working?" he asked.

"You're both on light cases for the time being."

"Thank you sir," Danielle acknowledged.

Ray slid a light brown file across the desk. "Carter, check your report on the Johnson case."

"Why?" she questioned.

Ray sighed. "There is a miscalculation in the Krupp drug evidence."

"I'll do that now."

Ray handed Danielle a small white card with the SFPD logo on it. "You've got an appointment with the department shrink the day after tomorrow."

"Can we go?" Jack questioned jokingly as he opened the door.

"Yes, go. Carter it's good to see you back," Ray said as she followed Jack out of the room.

Danielle smiled at Jack. "I'll be up in a bit."

"Okay. Hey, Carter, do you want to go to Revolution after work?"

"Sure," Danielle replied as she made her way to the stairs.

 

"Hey Lee," Danielle cheerfully said as she entered the narcotics evidence room.

"Hey Carter, it's good to see you," Lee said, honestly.

"Can you open the vault for me? I need the Krupp evidence from the Johnson case."

Lee entered his access code to open the vault. He took out the evidence box, placing it on a small desk in the center of the room.

"I'll leave you to it," Lee said as he left the room.

Danielle quickly scanned her calculations when she realized that she'd written cocaine: 1200k. She corrected the amount to cocaine 120k. She stared at the packages of white powder in front of her contemplating her options for a moment. As she placed a tiny amount into a plastic evidence bag, she looked around to make sure she was still alone. She quickly stuffed the bag into her pocket. She resealed the evidence box, placing it back in the vault.

As Danielle reached the top of the stairs, she noticed that Jack was waiting and that he had her coat. "You ready?" he impatiently asked.

"Five minutes," she said as went into the ladies room.

 

~~~Danielle slipped into the stall and locked the door, pulling the seat lid down. She removed the bag, a card, and a bill from her pocket before crouching down. She carefully tipped the contents onto the seat, sighing as she broke the fine white powder into a line with her appointment card. She rolled up the bill, quickly inhaling, as she snorted the drug.

She felt the rush instantly, choosing to wait a moment before getting up.

She flushed the toilet and came out, quickly washing her hands, giving herself a rapid once-over in the mirror. "I'll pass," she muttered to herself.~~~

 

"Finally," Jack said irritated, when Danielle finally came out.

Jack handed her coat to her. "Thanks Jack, had to powder my nose."

He jokingly asked. "You drink too much coffee?"

"Er yeah," she chuckled.

"Do you still want to go to Revolution?"

"I'm ready for that drink," she answered rapidly.

*

Jack smiled curiously at Danielle. "You like this corner."

"Yeah, it's peaceful here."

"So, is this our corner?" he probed.

"I suppose it is," Danielle answered contentedly as she knocked back her drink.

"Steady on," Jack said as he scanned the menu. "You want anything?"

Danielle didn't look at the menu. "I'll have fries and another drink."

"Is that all you want?"

"Fries are fine, Jack."

After a moment, she looked around. "Need to hook up with Aaron," Danielle mumbled softly, arousing Jack's suspicions, although he put it down to her been back at work so soon after her ordeal, rather than something else.

 

Danielle's cell phone vibrated against the table as Jack returned with her drink. She quickly checked the caller ID. "Hi dad," she answered brightly.

"Danni, when are you coming to visit?" he asked apprehensively.

"I can come over tomorrow," she offered.

"Bring your friend, I’d like to meet him," he said hopefully.

"Okay dad, I'll bring him," she tittered.

"Good and your brothers are coming too."

"Love you dad," she said as she ended the call.

Danielle gave Jack a skeptical look. "Problem?" he asked.

"We're going to my parents tomorrow," she avowed.

"We are, why?" he asked, masking his surprise.

Danielle smiled faintly. "My dad wants to meet you and my brothers will be there too."

Jack noticed that Danielle had left over half her fries. "Are you finished?"

"I'm not really hungry," she said apologetically as she quickly swallowed the remnants of her drink.

Jack put his arm around her as they left the bar. "Don't apologize."

*

Danielle locked the door and made her way to the kitchen. "Do you want a drink?" she offered politely.

"I'm fine," Jack declined, as they sat down and watched TV in restful silence.

 

\---Danielle's hand trailed between Jack's legs, cupping his groin as she sat on his lap facing him. She felt him again, knowing that she was turning him on. She smiled at Jack as she watched him as he tried to anticipate her next move as she made light work of his jeans. Her hand found its way inside his boxers stroking and teasing his length causing him to breathe heavily as she flicked her tongue over the head, licking off a pearl of precome. 

"Danni," he rasped as she smiled innocently at him. 

"I need this, Jack, I need you," she said huskily as she kissed him attentively on the mouth. 

He responded with a deeper, more passionate kiss as her hand continued to tease his length.

Jack quickly undid her pants, pulling them and her thong down her thighs in a swift movement. 

"Wait. I don't have any condoms," Jack admitted, disappointed. 

Danielle produced one from her jacket pocket, tearing the foil with her teeth; she quickly rolled the thin casing onto him. "I don't do bareback," she chuckled hoarsely as he pulled her closer to him entering her fully. She hissed pleasurably as he took her nipple in his mouth, rubbing her clit with his thumb.

"This is crazy," Jack cried out as Danielle held his hand, as she got close. 

"Not crazy," she rasped as she dug her fingernails into his back, scratching him as she came.

A short beat later she collapsed against him, not daring to move for fear that she was dreaming.

Jack looked at her understandingly. "Are you okay?" he enquired caringly.

"I'm okay." Danielle smiled as she closed her eyes.---

 

Danielle was awoken by the fizzing noise coming from the TV. She looked at Jack realizing that they were in the same half-naked half-dressed state that they were in last night. "It was real," she uttered regretfully.

She got up and made her way to the bathroom. She locked the door, and turned the shower on. She quickly undressed and climbed under it.

As her tears flowed with the water, she tried to figure out why she used Jack for her own gratification and why he had let her use him. She concluded that her behavior must have been brought on by the cocaine because she would never cross the line like that with a friend, especially not her best friend. She knew that she would have to live it, they both would. A loud knock on the door disturbed her thoughts. "Danni, are you in there?"

"I won't be long," she shouted as she got out of the shower, quickly wrapping a bath towel around her body. She opened the door. "I'm getting dressed, and going to my parents," she said disconsolately as Jack passed her on his way in.

"That's fine," he said as he shut the door.

 

Danielle was waiting by the elevator for Jack. "About time," she barked.

A look of confusion escaped Jack's eyes. "What's wrong with you?" he queried.

"Nothing, I'm fine," she snapped as they got on the elevator.

*

Danielle pointed to a decrepit green car parked in the driveway outside the Victorian style house. "Robbie's here," she noted excitedly.

"I was expecting a multicolored tent," Jack joked.

Danielle shook her head. "Don't say things like that," she warned him as they walked in.

"Someone's home," Jack pointed out as he made out the faint sound coming from a TV.

"Dad?" Danielle shouted.

A beat later, a slim middle-aged man wearing board shorts and a ripped t-shirt emerged from the lounge. "Starshine," he said excitedly as he hugged her tightly.

Jack coughed impetuously. "Danielle, are you going to introduce us?"

Danielle momentarily pulled away. "Oh sorry. Jack, this is my dad, Emlyn. Dad, this is Jack."

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Carter," Jack said politely as they shook hands. 

"It's good to finally put a face to the name," Emlyn said, masking his expectation.

"Where's mom?"

"She's in the kitchen with Steven, they're making dinner."

Danielle shot Jack fleeting look, hesitating for a moment. "We'll watch TV with you and Robbie." Robbie was watching a tacky soap opera, mumbling something at the characters. "Hey, we have company," Danielle mocked lovingly. The man turned his head at the sound of her voice. 

"Starshine" he smirked spiritedly as he patted the space next to him. 

Emlyn sat in the armchair, Danielle and Jack sat on the couch with Robbie. They were watching their favorite show The Gallant and the Magnificent to Jack's perplexity. 

Steven opened the door. "Mom says dinner's ready."

"Just two more minutes," Emlyn pleaded. 

"We need to know if Star and Trent really are sister and brother," Danielle added. Steven rolled his eyes at them as he closed the door.

Robbie was taken aback. "I cannot believe we have to wait until tomorrow to find out," he said, as the four of them made their way to the kitchen. "Hi mom, this is Jack," Danielle said to the tall plump woman. 

"I saw him when you arrived," she said flippantly.

"Nice to meet you, Mrs Carter," Jack said politely. 

Steven gave Jack a disdainful look. "Are you gonna to introduce me, Danielle?"

Danielle smiled apologetically. "Sorry Steven, this is Jack."

"How are you doing man?" Steven asked.

"I'm good," Jack replied as he took his seat.

 

"I'll do the dishes," Jack offered.

Emlyn smiled thankfully. "Stay where you are Jack, you're a guest. Roxy and I will do them later."

Danielle smiled contentedly as she had a swig of her soda. "Dad, can I give Jack the grand tour?" she asked with anticipation.

"Sure thing, Starshine."

Roxy shot Jack and Danielle a critical look. "Emlyn, go with them," she commanded. 

 

"I'm sorry about my mom and Steven, Jack," Danielle offered.

Jack smiled softly. "It's okay."

"Roxy and Steven aren't usually like that with guests, Jack." A moment later Emlyn reminded them. "You've seen the lounge and kitchen."

When they reached the top of the stairs, Danielle stood outside her bedroom. "Don't laugh, Jack. It's the way I left it when I left home," she said as she opened the door.

Jack noticed the color scheme. "It's very... erm... blue."

Emlyn smiled at the comment. "It's always been her favorite color."

"Yeah I know," Jack chuckled sweetly.

A few moments later, they made their way back downstairs. "You have a very nice home."

"Thank you," Steven replied sneakily.

 

Roxy and Steven looked at the clock. "It's getting late," Roxy snapped.

Emlyn quickly looked out of the window; he glared at her and Steven for their newly found impoliteness. "It's too foggy to drive; you're all staying here tonight."

"Well they can't sleep together," Steven remarked spitefully.

Danielle scowled at Steven. "It's not up to you where Jack sleeps."

Jack cut into their little argument. "Hey I don't mind driving home," he offered peacefully.

"My sister almost died because of you and you don't mind driving home," Steven roared.

Robbie banged his hands on the table. "Stop fighting," he demanded.

"Sorry," Steven and Danielle mumbled in unison.

"Incase you hadn't noticed Steven, Danielle is still alive," Robbie stated.

Jack put his arms around Danielle as she fought against the ever-present threat tears. "At least Jack has been looking after me, what have you two been doing?" 

Robbie and Steven both looked stunned. "Well... we've... erm..." Steven stuttered. 

"Done nothing because we have no idea what to say or do," Robbie said softly, answering for them both.

Emlyn smiled appreciatively at Jack. "That settles it. Jack is sleeping with Danielle in her room."

*

Jack and Danielle were sitting in the waiting area; he was holding her hand while they waited for her to be called in to her appointment.

"I understand about the sex, Danni," Jack mentioned tactfully.

Danielle rolled her eyes. "It's not about you," she snapped.

"I never said that it was about me." Jack said, clearly shocked by the cruelty of her reaction.

"It shouldn't have happened," Danielle sighed. "It was a mistake," she added regretfully.

"How was it a mistake?" Jack probed, curiously.

Danielle directed a fleeting glance at Jack. "I wasn't thinking. I was…" she trailed off.

"Caught up in a moment," Jack added, finishing her sentence for her.

"Something like that."

Jack fired an apathetic gaze in her direction. "What about last night Danni?" he inquired. 

"Last night was nice; being held while I slept made me feel protected. I felt safe," Danielle admitted, thankfully.

 

Jack gently nudged Danielle as he noticed a tall stocky woman emerge from the meeting room. "Danielle?" she asked.

Jack lightly squeezed her hand. "Anytime you need me Danni, I'll be here."

Danielle released a weighty sigh as she got up. "Save my coat. Shouldn't be too long," she said as she closed the door.

 

The women shook hands and sat down. "Your boss referred you, Danielle," Janice stated.

"Yes, because some sick creep tried to kill me."

Janice smiled curiously at Danielle. "Today is just about getting to know each other."

"What do you wanna know?" Danielle asked.

"Anything you want to tell me," Janice answered. "The guy outside?" she asked.

Danielle smiled sadly. "Jack's my friend."

"Really," Janice said, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes."

"Do you want more from him, Danielle?"

Danielle shook her head. "No because I don't like him in that way."

Janice was making bullet points of their conversation. She looked at the travel-sized clock on the table. "Our time is almost up. Do you want to come next week?"

"Sure," Danielle responded positively.

"Bye, Danielle. See you next week," Janice said as Danielle opened the door.

Jack got up, helping Danielle into her coat. "How was it?" he asked.

Danielle smiled softly. "Really good, I'm coming again next week."

*

Lee entered Jack's office. "Hey man, I have something to show you," he said.

Jack shot him a curious look. "Okay," Jack said as they went to Ray's office.

Ray gave Jack a sad glance. "This is the security footage from the narcotics lock up," he stated.

Jack's eyes widened in horror as he touched the computer screen witnessing Danielle pocketing a tiny amount of cocaine. "Oh Danni," he whispered wretchedly.

Ray and Lee directed suspicious looks at Jack. "Oh Danni," Lee mocked.

Jack shook his head at the men. "This is the last thing I ever expected to see her doing."

"Thanks Lee," Ray said as the Chinese man left the room, closing the door behind him.

Ray sighed. "What are we gonna do?"

"I don't know man," Jack admitted, defeated.

"Do you think she needs more sessions with Janice?"

Jack smiled pensively. "I have an idea."

"What idea?" Ray asked, his curiosity getting the better of him.

"Rehab."

Ray released an aggressive groan. "Rehab, Jack. Where's she gonna get treatment? All our centers have an eighteen month waiting list."

"I'll find somewhere. Just give me an hour, sir," Jack pleaded as he left.

"All right."

Jack went to his office; he noticed that Danielle had her earphones in as he passed her office so he decided not to disturb her. He closed his door and took the computer off standby. When it finally loaded, he clicked the internet icon, waiting a few seconds he quickly typed rehabilitation centers in San Francisco. He clicked several random links before one caught his eye. 

"Bellows Grove," he mumbled, clicking the link. He scrolled the page taking in the costs, treatment plans and location, as well as the size of the grounds.

 

He quickly filled out the online admittance form, leaving the age field blank while he checked the birthday reminders on his cell phone. "Thirty," he muttered as he typed in the numbers.

Danielle walked in. "Thirty?" she questioned curiously.

Jack looked up from his computer. "I was just thinking," he answered.

"Oh okay, I'm going out for coffee. Do you want anything?"

"I'll come with you; I need to stretch my legs."

Danielle smiled at him. "I'll meet you outside in five."

"Okay," Jack said as he clicked send and switched his computer to standby.

 

"Hale," Ray shouted as he saw him walking past his office.

Jack quickly backtracked. "I've found a center, sir, Bellows Grove. It's in Parkside on Rivera and Thirty Second. I filled the forms in while I was online," he said.

"When does she go?" Ray queried, anxiously.

"It doesn't work like that, someone will phone me when there's a place," Jack replied forbearingly.

Ray sighed. "So we've gotta wait and see."

"Afraid so man," Jack said as he made his way outside to meet Danielle.

*

Jack held the door open for Danielle. "Get a table, I'll order," he said.

Danielle smiled as she found a vacant table near the window; she sat down and placed her coat over the chair facing her.

Jack brought their drinks to the table. "Thanks Jack," Danielle acknowledged as she wrapped her hands around the cup.

Danielle took a sip. "Hot," she grimaced, pulling a face that made Jack chuckle. "Obviously."

Jack’s phone startled Danielle from her people watching as it rang loudly. "Yeah," he answered.

"Can I speak to Jack Hale, please?"

"Speaking," Jack replied.

"My name is Marcus Cummins. I'm a drug counselor at Bellows Grove."

"Thanks for getting back to me so quickly man."

"Your friend is using cocaine, are they using anything else?"

"Booze, occasionally."

"We actually have an opening today. Can you and your friend come at 1:20?"

"Sure thing man," Jack said, ending the call.

Danielle looked curiously at him. "What was that about?" she asked.

"Follow up."

"Which case Jack?" Danielle probed.

Jack sighed sadly. "One I worked with Kim." 

"Want me to do anything?" Danielle asked, smiling delicately at him.

Jack shook his head. "No. Thanks anyway."

*

Jack pulled in to the gravel car park. They both got out of the car. 

"What is this place?" Danielle asked as she took in the large three-storey building. 

"Bellows Grove," Jack replied.

"I got that from the signs, Jack. What does it do?"

"It helps people with problems," he answered as they went in.

They walked into the reception area. "I'm here to see Marcus Cummins," Jack said to the receptionist while Danielle was looking the various posters and artwork scattered about the walls. She turned and noticed that Jack was talking to tall black man. A brief beat later, she walked over to Jack and noticed her name on a committal form as he handed his credit card over to the receptionist to pay for Danielle's treatment.

"What are you doing?" she demanded.

"I'm paying," he replied as he tried to hide his desperation.

"For what?" she asked, before quickly realizing it was for her. Jack didn't endeavor to conceal his heartbreak, giving her an agonizing look. "I DON'T NEED REHAB!" she screamed at him.

Bemusement washed over Marcus' face as he observed the commotion from his office.

Jack turned and began to slowly walk away from Danielle, his eyes filling with tears. "You do, Danielle. You're a wreck," he said softly.

Danielle spotted Marcus and pointed at him. "You know I'm right." 

"About what?" Marcus questioned her knowingly.

"I don't need to be here," she stated insolently.

Marcus smiled earnestly at Danielle. "Denial," he noted as he quickly put a blue wristband in her hand.

"GET OUT OF MY FACE!" she yelled as she stormed out.

 

Marcus found Danielle sitting beneath a tall oak tree. He noticed that she was crying and fiddling with the wristband. "You have to wear that. I remember my first time," he said.

"I thought I told you to get out of my face," Danielle mewled.

"I was exactly like you; I thought that I was fine. It was other people that had problems not me."

Danielle sighed rebelliously as she finally put the wristband on. "I don't have a problem."

"Is that why you're using California cornflake?"

Danielle's eyes widened in astonishment. "How do you know about that?"

"You're friend saw you."

"That's impossible."

"How is it impossible?" he questioned.

Danielle smiled ruefully. "I made sure no one was watching me. Jack's just my friend and it's not what you're thinking."

"He's watched the security footage from your work." Marcus shot her a quizzical look. "And what am I thinking?"

"I don't know," Danielle chuckled. "When can I leave?" she asked.

"In twenty eight days, after you've completed your treatment."

Danielle rolled her eyes. "I'm leaving today. I'm leaving now."

Marcus raised his hands in surrender. "I'm not stopping you, Danielle, but your friend is paying for your treatment."

Danielle stood up, searching her pockets for her cell phone. Marcus watched on shaking his head as she made her way out of the grounds, talking on her phone.

*

Danielle walked up to a blonde haired man. "Hey Aaron," she said, tapping him on the shoulder. 

He turned around. "Hi Danni, I got what you wanted."

Danielle produced a crumpled bill from her coat pocket. "This is all I have," she said as Aaron passed her a small plastic bag. "Enjoy," he said joyfully.

"I want you to do the honors." Danielle stated. "For old time's sake," she added, holding the bag out to him.

 

~~~Aaron emptied the contents of the bag onto the back of Danielle's hand. She placed her hand under her nose, ingesting the white powder. She quickly rubbed the excess powder from her nose on her coat sleeve.~~~

 

"Feeling better?" Aaron enquired.

Danielle heaved a sigh a relief. "Much better."

"I gotta be somewhere babe," Aaron whispered as he kissed Danielle's forehead. "I'll get you on the VIP list at Evolution."

"Okay, I'll call you," she said softly as he walked away.

 

Jack was driving around, looking for Danielle. "Haven't found her yet," he said sorrowfully as he ended the call.

Jack spotted someone lying in the middle of the street, having a seizure. He instantly hit the brakes, leaving the engine running as he went to check on them. "You okay?" he shouted as he got closer.

"Oh hell no," Jack whimpered as he realized that it was Danielle and not a stranger. He noticed the off-white froth at the edges of her mouth. "Thank god," he exhaled noisily as he checked her pulse. He carefully picked her up and carried her to the car.

Jack took a moment to get the back door open. "Hold on baby," he whispered as he laid Danielle in the recovery position on the back seat, using his jacket to support her head. Once he knew that she wouldn't roll off the seat, he slammed the door, rubbing his face as he closed his door, hitting the accelerator.

"Danni, baby, hold on," he demanded as she released a barely audible groan.

*

Jack parked his car in a vacant ambulance bay. He left the engine running as he carefully picked Danielle up, cradling her as he ran into the busy yet understaffed emergency room.

"Help! Somebody help me!" he yelled as he attempted to get someone's attention,

A tall Hispanic man walked towards Jack. "I'm Doctor Raddox. What happened?" he asked, noticing the dried out white froth around Danielle's mouth.

Jack looked at the man's ID badge. "Overdose, I think."

The doctor spotted an unoccupied cubicle. "Let's get her in there," he directed. Jack followed him in, carefully laying Danielle on the bed while the doctor closed the curtains. "I need to ask a few questions so that I can determine the best course of treatment for. Do you know her?"

"Danielle Carter," Jack said as he choked the threatening tears away.

The doctor looked at his clipboard. "Do you know what drugs she's taken? How much she's taken and when it was taken?"

"Cocaine but I don't know how much. I guess sometime between 3:20 and 8:50. I found her around 8:50."

"Did she take it with alcohol, chemicals, or other drugs?"

Jack shook his head. "I don't think she did, I wasn't with her. She's supposed to be in rehab."

"Do you know how old she is?"

"Yeah, she's thirty."

The doctor glanced at Danielle. "She's still unconscious and has vomited at least once. Did she have any other symptoms when you found her?"

"She was having a seizure and her pulse and heartbeat were fast."

The doctor left the cubicle for a moment, returning with a small trolley that contained a selection of flexible plastic tubes and various fluid solutions.

"I gotta stay with her man," Jack pleaded.

The doctor ushered Jack outside the cubicle. "Sorry, you'll have to wait outside."

Uncertainty escaped Jack's eyes. "Hey what are you going to do to her?" 

"A gastric lavage, it's used to rinse the stomach out after a suspected overdose, and we'll also be taking blood and urine samples to determine if it is just cocaine that she's taken or if she's taken other drugs with it."

Jack smiled appreciatively at the doctor. "I can't lose her man."

"I'll do everything I can," Doctor Raddox reassured Jack as he went back to continue treating Danielle.

 

The nurse checked Danielle's airway and breathing. "Her airway is clear; she doesn't need intubating." Doctor Raddox handed Danielle's blood and urine samples to the nurse. "Get these up to the lab for analysis. I need to know what else she's taken ASAP."

Another nurse entered the cubicle, observing the doctor as he inserted the tube up through Danielle's nose, down her throat and into her stomach, holding the tube in place with surgical tape. He began to suction her stomach contents out through the tube; a beat later, he quickly and expertly injected saline solution into the tube, rinsing her stomach out before suctioning the solution. He removed the tube while the nurse inserted a needle into the back of Danielle's hand, attaching it to a dextrose drip.

The nurse opened the curtains when he removed the trolley; he noticed that Jack was sitting on the floor near the cubicle. "You can go back in now."

Jack looked up at the young man. "Thank you," he acknowledged.

 

"Is she okay?" Jack queried.

Doctor Raddox smiled understandingly at Jack. "Yeah she will be." 

The doctor's pager bleeped, he checked the number dialing the lab extension. "Hi, this is Doctor Raddox, you paged me." He listened intently for a few minutes as he noted down Danielle's test results. "Positive for cocaine, ketamine, and adderall. Thanks for doing them so quickly." He hung up and looked at Jack. "That was the lab, she tested positive for cocaine, ketamine, and adderall."

"We're keeping her in overnight to monitor her. It's only a precautionary measure."

"Can I stay with her?" Jack asked.

"Sure, I'll see if there's a bed free upstairs and get her transferred as soon as I can."

*

Jack pulled up a creaky plastic chair as close to the bed as space would allow him. He placed his arm across Danielle's stomach, holding her other hand as he rested his head on her chest, smiling peacefully as he listened to her steadying heartbeat.

Jack got up and moved away from the bed when Danielle's doctor came in to check on her. He checked her pulse and general responsiveness, making a note of the numbers on her chart. The doctor smiled curiously at Jack on his way out of the room.

A beat later Jack took his seat, wanting nothing more than to lie beside her and hold her until she came around, he decided that he was be better staying as he was because of the limited space and his own unfounded fear of knocking a wire loose. 

"Danni, I want you back. I don't like the new you because you look and feel like a totally different person," Jack whispered, pausing briefly when felt Danielle squeeze his hand. "I miss you. I miss Starshine," he spoke softly, choking his tears back.

 

Danielle took a moment to allow her eyesight to adjust to the faint illumination of the room. "Jack, Where am I?" she whispered unsteadily. 

Jack lifted his head from her chest. "Hospital, you overdosed and had your stomach pumped. I was really scared when I found you."

"I scared you, Jack?"

Jack rested his head against Danielle's shoulder. "Yeah, when I found you I honestly believed that you were going to die."

"You saved me, Jack." 

Jack smiled unconvincingly. "I seem to be doing that a lot lately."

"Yeah, you do." Danielle chuckled insipidly. "You called me baby, twice." 

"Did I?"

Danielle tittered quietly. "Yes, you did."

 

Doctor Raddox came back in the room. “Danielle you're very lucky to be alive but you are at risk of a stroke or a heart attack in the next three days."

Danielle shrugged her shoulders at the doctor. "I live the life, I pay the price."

The doctor frowned at Danielle's disregard for her health, directing a worried look at Jack. "Did you know what was in the cocaine you took?" 

"No, Aaron said it was pure and I believed him."

"We ran some tests." The doctor stopped. "It wasn't pure Danni," Jack added finishing the man's sentence for him.

"What?" Danielle rolled her eyes. "Jack, you're lying."

"I'm sorry Danielle, he's not lying. You also tested positive for ketamine and adderall."

Danielle mewled. "I never took those, just coke."

"Danni, listen to me, Aaron sold you coke but it was cut with ketamine and adderall. He knew it was bad."

The doctor looked at Jack and Danielle. "This will help with your heartbeat," he said, ripping a prescription off his pad. "You can go home when you're ready, Danielle."

"I'll look after her," Jack promised as the doctor left the room.

*

Danielle noticed Jack putting pop tarts in the toaster. "I don't want anything," she said lowly.

Jack turned to her. "Just try half for me Danni, besides these are only thing that's still in date." 

Danielle turned the radio on; she was humming along to the song that was playing. "I might go out tonight," she said as she started to shimmy to the beat.

Disapproval escaped Jack's eyes as he registered her statement. "Whatever Danni," he sighed.

Danielle was picking at her pop tart. "I feel like having a night out," she stated, shrugging her shoulders.

Jack released a weary sigh. "I'm scared for you Danni," he admitted sadly.

"Why?"

"You're taking this destructive streak too far."

"It's not a destructive streak Jack, it's called living," she snapped as she pushed her plate away. A short beat later, she stood up. "I'm off to bed, I told you I wasn't hungry," she muttered as she made her way out of the kitchen.

Jack turned the radio off and cleaned up; once he had put everything away, he went into the lounge and sat down. He was writing a note for Danielle when he thought he heard her call out. He went to check on her and noticed that she was still asleep. He blinked the threatening tears away when he realized that it would be the only time when she was truly at peace with herself, and the world.

Jack propped his note against the TV remote before he left.

 

Danielle looked at her watch. "Jack," she called out, expecting to get an answer. When she didn't she got out of bed, quickly changing into her clubbing clothes.

She noticed Jack's note on the table before she left. She unfolded it silently reading it mumbling the last sentence. "I don't want to lose another partner. When you need me, I'll be here, no matter what. Jack."

Danielle locked the door, stuffing Jack's note into her purse with her keys, money, and cell phone.

*

Aaron was queuing outside Evolution minding his own business when Danielle approached him. "Son of a bitch. You almost killed me," Danielle yelled disdainfully.

"I didn't know babe," Aaron said, attempting to feign innocence.

"You're a bad liar Aaron. You always were."

Aaron smiled gently at Danielle. "Let me buy you a drink, my way of apologizing."

Danielle sighed. "Alright, but I'm coming to the bar with you."

"Hey guys," the bouncer said as he checked Aaron's card and stamped the back Danielle's hand, passing a card to her.

 

"Hey, what money have you got?" Aaron enquired hopefully.

"Not much, why?"

"I thought you might want a couple of line tonight."

Danielle flashed a mischievous smile. "I do but my money has to last me until I get paid."

Aaron's eyes flashed wildly at her admission. "You look like you need a hit."

Danielle momentarily hesitated. "Well, I do need one but I can wait till I have some money."

Aaron grabbed Danielle's arm. "Come with me," he directed as they made their way to the bathroom.

They slipped into the diminutive stall, locking the door. "It's a little cramped," Danielle chuckled. 

"It is," Aaron agreed.

"Before I cut a line I want you to do something for me," he said as he kissed Danielle's exposed shoulder. 

"Alright but just this one time."

 

~~~Danielle gasped as she felt something cold and metallic digging into her lower back as Aaron held onto her hips as he entered her, quickly finding his rhythm as Danielle quietly groaned as he quickened his pace, scratching her arm as he came.

A few minutes passed when Aaron pulled a small bag from his pocket tipping the contents onto the cistern, using his VIP card to cut it into lines. "How many, babe?" he asked.

Danielle thought for a moment. "Two," she answered as she quickly inhale the lines sniffling as the instant buzz hit every fiber of her being. "I feel great."~~~

 

"Nobody noticed," Danielle said lowly as she and Aaron made their way back to the dance floor.

"Want another drink?" Aaron offered.

"Yeah," Danielle replied, hitting send on a text message.

A moment later Danielle joined Aaron at the bar. "Anytime you need a hit Danni, call me," Aaron said.

Danielle quickly finished her drink. "I will do," she acknowledged, exiting the club.

*

The manager was sweeping up, getting ready to close the club when he spotted Danielle and Aaron sitting on the steps, finishing their beers. "Hey guys, I'm supposed to close at six." 

"Sorry man, we didn't realize," Aaron said apologetically as he and Danielle made their way to the exit.

"Come back tonight."

Danielle squinted as the morning sun greeted her smoky eyes, shivering as the chill brushed against her diminished frame. "I have to work and then all being well I'll be out tonight."

A hint of disbelief escaped Aaron's eyes. "Are you going straight to work?" he asked, refusing to hide his surprise.

Danielle lightly shook her head. "Coffee Bean first, then work. I haven't time to go home and change."

Aaron laughed cynically. "If I didn't know you so well, Danni, I'd say that you were out of control."

Danielle smiled at the comment. "You know me better than anyone, and you know I'm not out of control," she replied mischievously.

"See you later babe," he said as Danielle planted a soft parting kiss on his lips.

*

Jack was walking passed the stairs when he spotted Danielle making her way down. He had to look twice at her when he realized that she must have come straight from the club because she was wearing a sparkly halter-top, black miniskirt, and open-toe shoes; her hair was clipped-up in a no-fuss arrangement.

"Morning," he said calmly.

"Need to sit down," Danielle uttered breathlessly as she pulled her keys out of a pocket.

"Did you go out last night?" he inquired carefully.

"Yes and I haven't been home yet, so don't start," she snapped.

"If you're looking for a fight Danielle, you're looking in the wrong place," Jack stated defiantly as he walked out of her office.

Danielle quickly followed him out, kicking him on the back of the leg. "I wasn't looking for a fight, Jack," she bitched as he turned to face her.

"Let me guess, you are now," he retorted calmly as Danielle repeatedly punched him in the stomach. She paused for a moment, aiming her fist at his face.

As her fist was about to make contact with his cheek, Jack firmly gripped her wrist, slipping his other arm around her waist to restrain her.

"Get off me!" Danielle demanded, aggressively kicking his knees.

"No," Jack whispered calmly in her ear.

Ray came out of his office to see what the hullabaloo was about, he was shocked to see that Danielle was been forcefully restrained by Jack.

"Let go of me!" Danielle barked, as she continued brutally kicking his knees.

Ray directed a troubled expression at Jack. "Jack, do what she says."

Jack shook his head at his boss's request. "No way man."

"Jack," Ray ordered.

Jack sighed as he decided to listen to Ray. "Just keep her away from me," he commanded as he finally released Danielle from his grip. "She's fucking crazy," he snapped as he slammed his office door.

Ray walked towards them, holding his hand out to Danielle. "Carter, you're coming with me."

Danielle wiped her tears away, opting to remain silent as she followed Ray out of the office, up to the roof.

*

Ray and Danielle were standing on the roof of the office. "What's going on Carter?" he queried.

Danielle released a frustrated sigh. "My life's spiraling out of control and I don't know how to stop it."

"Stop what?"

"Everything," she answered sadly.

"Define everything, Carter."

Danielle leant against the safety barrier, looking out across the city. "The worst part is the coke comedowns, they make me moody and irrational."

Ray was surprised at Danielle's honesty. "Jack is just about ready to give up on you."

"I know he is and he's been looking out for me, trying to help me. I've been treating him like shit." 

Ray stubbed his cigarette out. "I'd like you to give rehab another shot," he said tactfully.

"I didn't work last time, sir."

Ray smiled at Danielle's comment. "You lasted for two hours, Carter."

"I know," Danielle smiled.

Ray sighed. "Will you give it another shot?"

Danielle nodded her head. "I'll try."

"Good," Ray replied. "Carter, tell me about that fight."

Danielle released a soft moan. "Something inside me just snapped."

"Snapped, how?"

"Jack walked away from me and I guess I just wanted to hurt him the way I've been hurting for the last four months."

Curiosity escaped Ray's eyes. "John Walker can't get to you Carter, he's on death row."

Danielle sighed sadly. "I still hear his snarling voice when I close my eyes and I made a mistake with Jack."

Ray shook his head. "Do I want to hear about this mistake?"

"No, sir." Danielle said, looking apologetically at Ray. "I'm sorry for everything; tell Jack I didn’t mean any of it."

"I'll tell him but there is a chance he won't believe it," Ray said.

"Yeah I know there is and I'll understand if he doesn't believe any of it."

*

"No one adult human being is happy!" Cassie vehemently declared.

"Never," Danielle sniped.

"You'll get your turn Danielle," Marcus intervened.

"Thank Marcus, Dan Dan," Cassie said, continuing her speech. "People are born, they have a limited amount of time going around thinking life is dandy but then, inevitably, tragedy strikes and they realize life equals loss!"

"What?" Danielle bitched.

"It's from Sandra Bullock's best movie Dan Dan."

A sarcastic laugh escaped Danielle’s mouth. "I'm still waiting for her to make a decent movie."

Cassie frowned at Danielle. "Dan Dan," she said, attempting to mask her hurt.

"That's it!" Danielle yelled, knocking her chair over as she quickly rose to her feet. "Do I look like a prehistoric delinquent to you?"

"Danielle, please leave," Marcus requested.

"I'm going," Danielle bitched as she stormed out.

Cassie shook her head. "Something I said?" she questioned innocently.

"Maybe. I'll talk to her later," Marcus said. "Is there anything else you want to say?"

Cassie fleetingly lowered her head. "The whole point of the game is to minimize the pain caused by that equation!"

"Thank you, Cassie," Marcus acknowledged.

 

Marcus watched Danielle for a beat as she hummed along to her ipod. 

"It doesn't mean much. It doesn’t mean anything at all."

He knocked loudly on the doorframe to get her attention. "Have you calmed down yet?" he asked cautiously.

"A little," Danielle shivered.

"It's not cold Danielle," Marcus pointed out.

Danielle turned her ipod off. "I know it's not but I feel cold."

"It's called withdrawal. What are you listening to?"

"I know it is. It's my favorite song, Sweet Surrender. You want to know about earlier."

"That would be good, Danielle."

Danielle chuckled. "It hate it when people call me Dan Dan. I always have done."

Marcus hesitated for a moment. "You seem frightened of something, Danielle; do you want to tell me about it?"

"Was there an earthquake last night? Cause it felt like one."

"No, it was just the wind."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, why?"

"I don’t like earthquakes and only Jack knows what to do."

Marcus raised an eyebrow in suspicion. "What does Jack do, Danielle?"

"He tells me that everything is gonna be alright and that it'll be over soon, whenever one hits."

"So what exactly are you scared of?" Marcus questioned.

Danielle breathed a weighty sigh. "Losing Jack," she stated sadly.

"How are you going to lose him?"

"Because of all this. After John Walker tried to kill me, I only started using coke to help me cope with what happened that night. Somehow it spiraled out of control, I spiraled out of control."

"Anything else?"

"Yeah, if you see Cassie tell her I've calmed down," Danielle said as she turned her ipod back on.

"When I see her," Marcus said, as he left the room.

 

Cassie entered the room, hearing "When I'm down here. On my knees," seep out of Danielle's earphones.

"I'm sorry about this afternoon, Danielle," she offered.

"It's okay Cassie, I need to get out of here but I don't want to walk out, I've already done that."

Cassie crossed the room, looking down from their window. "What about the window?"

Danielle joined Cassie, nodding her head as she figured out the drop. "It's a good drop, I'll escape with a broken bone," Danielle remarked.

"I bet you don't jump."

"It's too easy, Cassie."

"What?" Cassie asked, clearly shocked by Danielle re-emerging thanatos.

Danielle shrugged her shoulders. "What stakes?"

"Alright, if you jump I'll give you my Skittles and if you don't jump I'll call you a gutless wonder."

"You're on," Danielle declared while she climbed onto the windowsill, sliding the window further open. Danielle briefly looked at Cassie. "Wait outside for me, I want my candy," Danielle stated as she leapt from the second floor, falling quickly to the ground landing awkwardly with her arm twisted out of joint.

"DANIELLE!" Cassie screamed as she ran to where Danielle lay injured.

Marcus and several other members of staff responded to Cassie's screams. "What happened?" Marcus panicked.

Danielle released a pain induced groan.

Cassie pushed her hair back. "She jumped man, she just jumped."

"Where's my Skittles?" Danielle moaned.

"What candy?" Marcus probed.

"The candy I bet Cassie for."

"You'll have to wait for your candy, Danielle. We've gotta get you to a hospital."

Danielle attempted to move her arm. "I'm fine," she grimaced.

"It might be broken," Cassie offered.

Danielle smiled victoriously. "At least I'll get out of here. See you around losers." 

*

Jack sat with Danielle and Marcus in the chaotic waiting area of the ER. "What she do?" Jack asked.

"You don't wanna know man," Marcus answered. 

Jack simply nodded his head. "I'll find out eventually."

Danielle looked at Jack. "Rehab is for quitters," she joked, grimacing as she attempted to move her arm. "Aw fucking hell," she hissed, rolling her eyes while Marcus and Jack chuckled at her reactions.

"It's your own fault, Danni," Jack retorted.

Doctor Raddox was reading something on his clipboard. "Danielle Carter," he called out.

Danielle used her good arm to hold onto the back of the chair while she got up. Jack got up, following her and the doctor into a treatment room.

"What happened?" Doctor Raddox asked as he got Danielle to hold both arms out in front of her while he compared sizes.

"Jumping accident," Danielle replied sarcastically.

Jack kept his expression typically neutral. "She thinks she's Wonder Woman," he said calmly, commenting on Danielle's accident. 

The doctor smiled sympathetically at Danielle. "Wiggle your fingers," he directed. Danielle cried out as she tried to do what she was been asked.

"So, what's she done?" Jack asked.

"I suspect that it's broken, I'm sending her upstairs for an x-ray to be sure."

 

Danielle was checking the clock on her cell phone when the doctor finally came back into the room. "We have your x-rays back Danielle and they are showing a compound fracture of the radius."

"Just tell me what I’ve done," Danielle demanded.

"You've broken your arm and will have to wear a cast for eight weeks."

Danielle smiled sweetly at the doctor. "Can I have a colored one?"

"Sure, what color?"

Jack frowned. "Let me guess," he mumbled.

"Blue," Danielle replied contently.

Jack sniped at Danielle. "Always with the blue."

Danielle smiled playfully at Jack, flipping the bird at him.

*

Danielle discharged an aggravated whine. "I have an itch."

"Scratch it," Jack replied sarcastically.

Danielle glared at Jack. "It's in an awkward place."

"Jack, will you help Ray?" Grace asked diplomatically.

"At least the sane people are outside."

Grace was stunned by Jack's statement. "He's referring to me, Grace," Danielle noted.

"Never," Jack sniped.

"Little boy," Danielle scolded as she attempted to goad Jack into another fight as he walked away, closing the back door as he went outside.

"Sorry about that Grace," Danielle said as she opened her wallet. "How much do I owe you for the food?"

"Put your money away, you’re a guest," Grace said smiling sentimentally as she noticed the photo of Jack and Danielle. "I kept a photo of my best friend in my wallet too."

Danielle was surprised at how happy her and Jack looked in the picture. "I never noticed it before; my dad must have put that in there."

"Jack's a good man, Danielle. Don't push him away or you'll lose him," Grace advised.

"Hey, what happened to him?"

Grace smiled contentedly as she looked out of the window. "I married him."

 

Danielle was sitting alone on the doorstep, listening to her ipod. She was drinking a can of soda. "Could do with vodka," she muttered unhappily to herself. 

Jack went up to Danielle. "Want some?" he asked offering her some of his food. When she didn't respond, he crouched down in front of her. "Starshine."

"Piss off, Jack."

Jack disregarded her request and sat next her, smiling thankfully as he heard "Every step I took in faith betrayed me." crackle through her earphones when she removed them.

"I know you're ready to give up on me Jack."

Jack was impressed by Danielle's honesty. "Danni, I don't want to give up on you but I don't know what else to do."

Danielle finished off her soda. "I bet you hate me right now Jack."

"Not really. I still can't figure out why you'd jump out of a window."

Danielle laughed gleefully. "I did it for a bet and I won."

"Actually, you lost. You broke your arm."

"No Jack, I won. I'm out of rehab," Danielle stated proudly. 

Jack rolled his eyes at her. "Okay," he remarked mordantly.

 

Ray spotted Jack and Danielle on the doorstep, walking up to them. "What are you two doing tonight?" he questioned.

Danielle looked up. "I'm going to my parents. I wanna watch The Gallant And The Magnificent with my dad and brother."

Ray handed his car keys to Danielle. "Wait in the car, Carter. I'll give you a ride."

The men watched Danielle make her way to the car. "I'll stay, help Grace and the girls clean up."

"Alright, thanks man," Ray said.

*

Once Ray killed the engine, Danielle opened the door. "Carter, wait a minute."

Danielle sighed. "I'm missing my show, sir."

"This won't take a minute."

Danielle shook her head. "I'm not going back to rehab."

"Okay, will you have more sessions with Janice then?"

"Yeah that would be good," Danielle said.

She got out of the car and sprinted up to the house.

 

Emlyn came out of the kitchen when he heard the front door closing. "Dinner's nearly ready. It's just you me and Robbie tonight, mom's gone to Steven's."

"Cool. Has it started?"

"Not yet, I'll bring dinner in."

Danielle went into the lounge, kicking her shoes off. "Hey," she said as she sat next to Robbie. 

Robbie noticed her cast. "Starshine, what happened?" he enquired.

Danielle chuckled. "I had an accident."

Emlyn brought their meals into the room, setting the tray down on the coffee table. All three took their plates, and settled down to watch their favorite show.

"When did you break your arm?" Emlyn asked, noticing Danielle's cast.

"A few weeks back."

Danielle picked at her food, nibbling on a piece of lettuce, disregarding her plate when she had enough. Robbie gently tapped her on the leg. "Danni, you need to get away from Aaron," he advised, refusing to hide his worry.

"I know I do but it's like I don't know how to, like I'm seventeen again," Danielle admitted nostalgically.

Emlyn threw some carrot sticks at Robbie and Danielle. "Dad what was that for?" they squealed, feigning shock.

"Shut up. I'm trying to watch the show and I can't read lips."

As soon as the credits rolled, Emlyn collected their plates. 

"Are you okay Danni?" he asked when he notice that she had scarcely touched her food. 

"I'm fine, just wasn't hungry. Sorry dad." 

"It's okay," Emlyn mumbled as he headed towards the kitchen.

Robbie glanced at Danielle. "Jack's a good man, Danni. If you keep treating him like shit you'll push him away or worse, you'll lose him forever."

Danielle rolled her eyes at him. "I've already had this from Grace."

"They're both right Danni," Emlyn stated when he returned.

"Yeah, I know they are but I'm not really thinking straight at the moment," Danielle confessed.

Emlyn called the timer up on the TV. "What are you two doing tonight?" he enquired.

"I'm staying," Robbie said.

Danielle smiled wistfully. "I'm going to Jack's."

 

Robbie watched Danielle as she strolled to the bottom of the street and hailed a cab. "She's just got in a cab," he said as he came away from the window.

"Did she see you?" Emlyn asked while he dialed Jack's number.

"Hello," Jack answered softly.

"Jack, its Emlyn. Danni's just left; she said she was going to your place."

"She hasn't arrived yet." Although Jack suspected that she had gone to Evolution to buy coke instead, he offered an explanation. "Maybe she stopped off for coffee."

"Yeah maybe," Emlyn sighed. "Call me when she arrives."

"Will do," Jack said ending the call.

*

Danielle paid the driver and got out of the cab. She went up to the bouncer, showing her VIP card. "Aaron's inside," he said.

Aaron spotted Danielle waiting at the bar. "Vodka lime for the lady put it on my tab," he shouted to the barman.

Danielle followed Aaron to the dance floor, taking her drink with her. "I love this song," she declared as the bass line kicked in. A moment later, she put her empty glass down and continued dancing as the DJ played more of his set.

Aaron put his hands on her waist, drawing her to him, whispering in her ear. "Okay," Danielle said as she followed him into the toilets.

 

~~~Aaron cut a line on the cistern, offering it to Danielle. 

"Ladies first," he said while he watched her selfishly inhale the line. "Want more?" Aaron enquired, knowing that she did.

"Yeah," she sniffled. "I haven't enough money."

Aaron winked at her. "For old times sake."

Danielle sighed hesitantly. "Alright but this is the last time."

Aaron lifted Danielle onto the edge of the sink, standing between her legs. He tenderly kissed her neck while he pushed her skirt up her thighs, pulling her thong to the side.  
Danielle grappled with his balls as he fiddled with the draw cord on his shorts.

Aaron urged her closer to him entering her, finding his rhythm as he fondled with her breasts.

Danielle closed her eyes thinking Jack's going to hate me, as she attempted to detach herself from the situation she was in yet again as Aaron came, opening her eyes as he withdrew.

While they quickly readjusted their clothes, Aaron directed a maudlin smile at Danielle. 

"Go nuts babe," he remarked as he cut several lines on the cistern and the seat lid.

Danielle snorted three lines at once, cackling excitedly as the immediate rush took a hold, giving her a new found energy. 

They left the toilets making their way back to the dance floor.~~~

"Thirsty," Danielle wheezed as she went to the bar. She leant against the bar for a brief moment as she felt her heartbeat quickening.

Aaron put his arm around her waist. "You okay?"

"Yeah fine, I just need a minute."

Danielle quickly swallowed her drink grimacing as she felt her heart beating more rapidly.

"You wanna get some air?" Aaron offered.

Danielle smiled at him. "I'll be fine, I'm gonna go home," she said declining Aaron's offer.

"I'll call you a cab."

"I'll walk, I need the air," Danielle bellowed as she exited the club. 

*

Danielle finally arrived at Jack's house, letting herself in. She spotted the dog sleeping in the armchair under the alcove as she removed her shoes before quickly and quietly making her way up to Jack's bedroom.

Jack heard her footsteps on the rug. "Have fun?" he questioned, lazily.

"Not really," she answered dishonestly, as she undressed and crawled into bed.

He placed his arm under her cast for support as he felt it grazing against his stomach; she curled up beside him, quickly falling asleep. Jack watched her for a few moments. "Why are you doing this, Starshine?" was his only thought before going back to sleep.

 

Danielle reached across to the nightstand, picking up Jack's watch. "Crap," she muttered as she strained to see the time. She got out of bed, quickly putting her sweaty clubbing clothes back on. She made her way downstairs and was about to open the door. "Not so fast," Jack hollered.

"I gotta go home."

Jack pulled a chair out for her. "Sit down," he demanded.

Danielle scoffed. "Why should I?"

Jack blinked away the ever-present threat of tears. "Danni, you need to eat."

Danielle sighed, irritated. "I'm not hungry, Jack."

"Why are you doing this, Danni?"

"What this, Jack?" Danielle asked, laughing derisively as she reeled off a short list. "Having sex, getting drunk or doing coke?” 

"All of them," he replied as he struggled to the disguise the crack in his voice.

Danielle sat down. "It helps me to forget about what happened to me," she admitted sadly.

Jack moved his chair next to hers. "I thought your sessions with Janice were going well."

Danielle smiled softly. "They are."

"But?" Jack questioned.

"The sessions bring it all back. I don't want to remember, not yet at least."

Jack brushed a solitary tear from her cheek with his thumb. "I'll be here whenever you’re ready, Danni."

Danielle smiled at him. "I think I will try some food, Jack."

"Okay," he said as he got up and made his way to the kitchen. He quickly collected up their plates, placing them on the table. Danielle picked at her scrambled eggs for a moment before shoveling a forkful into her mouth. Jack smiled positively as he watched her clear her plate for the first time in months.

Danielle was about to get up. "Sit down, I'll put the dishes in the sink," he said.

"Okay. I'm going home, Jack."

"How are you going to get home?" he queried.

"I don't know," Danielle laughed. "I'll walk," she added.

"Give me a minute; I'll give you a ride."

"Thanks."

A beat later Jack slid the front door open; he let Danielle leave before him.

*

Jack parked his car on the street opposite Danielle's building. "Do you want any help?" he offered.

Danielle rolled her eyes at him. "What?"

Jack took a quick look at her cast, noticing how tatty it had become around the hand and wrist area. "Getting washed and dressed, it can't be easy."

"It's not easy," she acknowledged as she got out of the car, ignoring the oncoming traffic as she hurriedly ran across the road.

 

Danielle kicked her shoes off, making her way to the bathroom. She turned the shower on before going into the bedroom and getting her work clothes out of the closet. Jack was waiting near the bathroom with a plastic bag. "Give me your arm," he said as he carefully, yet tightly, wrapped the bag around her cast.

"That feels okay," she said contemplatively.

"Tell me when you need a hand," he whispered as she closed the door.

 

Danielle felt something lightly hit the side of her leg as she removed her skirt. She checked her pockets, quickly retrieving a wrap of cocaine. "Bingo," she muttered fervently as she put it back in her pocket for safekeeping.

She climbed under the shower, sighing with relief as the water and soap cascaded down her sweaty limbs, swirling down the drain while she continued to scrub her skin until she felt that all the dirt had finally been washed away.

As she climbed out her heartbeat became more rapid. "Jack," she yelled as she held onto the sink for support. Jack opened the door and went in, noticing the color draining from Danielle's features. 

"What's wrong?" he asked, unsurely. 

Danielle moaned. "My heart's beating too fast." 

Jack pulled a towel off the rail, wrapping it around her. "Come on," he said softly as he took her to her bedroom.

He got her to sit on the bed. "Try to relax."

"It's a bit hard to relax, Jack," Danielle conceded between shallow rasping breaths.

"Where are your meds?" he asked.

Danielle lowered her head. "I flushed them down the toilet."

Jack turned away for a moment as he attempted to control his anger. "Are you completely stupid?"

"No!" Danielle sobbed, failing to hide her fear.

"Why’d you flush them?"

"I didn’t need them anymore," she answered defiantly.

 

Jack took Danielle’s hand, pulling her to her feet. He stood behind her, forcing her to look at her reflection in the full-length mirror in the corner of the room as he removed the towel from her body. 

"What are you doing?" she asked, nonchalantly.

"Showing you what you are, what you’ve become," he jeered as his hands roamed over her emaciated drug-ravaged figure. 

"I’m fine," she whispered, recoiling as Jack’s fingers caught the edge of her ribcage, causing her to feel a little discomfort.

"No, Danni, you’re not fine."

Danielle fell to the floor, curling up in the fetal position near the mirror. "Why are you doing this Jack?" she complained, releasing more tears.

Jack wiped his own tears away. "I don’t know who you are anymore."

Danielle pleaded with him. "I'm still me Jack. I haven’t changed."

Jack took her work clothes off the bed, holding them out to her. "You have changed. You just can’t see it."

Danielle sat up, taking her clothes from him. "Well excuse me for not dealing with my problems," she snapped.

"Get dressed," he ordered as he left the room.

*

"I miss her Ray, I want her back," Jack admitted sadly while they watched Danielle from the relative safety of the younger man's office. 

"How's she holding up?" he questioned.

Jack released a defeated sigh. "She isn't man."

"If she'd just held her position like I told her to."

"It's not your fault Ray; no one could have known what was gonna happen. Not really."

 

Danielle entered the room, smiling delicately at the men. "I'm signing out Lieutenant."

Ray glanced at his watch. "Where are you going, Detective?"

"I have an appointment with Janice," Danielle said while she straightened her collar.

Jack smiled sadly at her. "You want some company?" he offered kindly.

"No thanks, I'll see you tomorrow."

Jack and Ray watched as Danielle quickly made her way up the stairs.

"Carter's blaming Walker for everything that's happening to her," Ray sighed despondently. "You know she only started that fight with you because she wanted to hurt someone the way that she's hurting."

"I know she blames him, she told me this morning, but I didn't know that was the reason she fought me."

"This morning, Jack?" Ray probed.

"She came to mine around four," Jack stated.

"She showed up when?" Ray asked, his eyes widening in surprise. "Do you think she'll go out again tonight Jack?"

Jack smiled shrewdly. "Not if I have anything to do with it."

"What are you going to do, Jack?"

"Take some dinner and a couple of DVDs to her place, I'm staying over whether she wants me to or not."

Ray frowned at the final part of Jack's plan. "Are you sure that staying the night is such a good idea? I've heard about the mistake she made with you."

"She's told me that it was a mistake too Ray but I don't believe her."

Curiosity escaped Ray's eyes. "Why don't you believe her?"

"When she shows up at my place, all she wants to do is get into bed with me and have a cuddle."

"Maybe it's her way of asking you for help Jack. For her, you are a safety net and she's reaching out to you," Ray said as he left Jack's office.

* 

"Sorry I'm late," Danielle said, helping herself to a drink of water from the cooler. She opened the pharmacy bag, looking at the clock on the table while she pushed the medication through the foil, popping it in her mouth. "Need the other around one am."

"What is that and why do you have to wait that long?" Janice probed.

"Plan B, the morning after pill." 

"Have you taken it before?"

"No, the pharmacy told that the pills have to be taken twelve hours apart for them to be effective, he also advised me of the side effects."

"Oh Danielle, who was he?" Janice muttered desolately.

"Aaron, for three lines of coke." Danielle said releasing a mournful sigh. "It really wasn't worth it."

"So you regret it?"

"Yeah, I do." Danielle lowered her head. "I told him that it was the last time I was doing that. I always feel so cheap and dirty afterwards."

"What did you do, when it was over?"

"Had another vodka lime and then I left the club." A wry smile crept across Danielle's lips. "This morning I woke up in Jack's bed and felt safe."

"How did you get to Jack's house?"

"I walked there." Danielle chuckled. "I know it's crazy but I just wanted a cuddle because I couldn't face been alone. Crazy."

"I can move my fingers again," Danielle said, laughing as she felt movement returning to her fingers for the first time in almost seven weeks. 

Janice smiled at Danielle. "When does your cast come off?"

"Next Thursday. Jack's coming with me."

Janice looked at the clock on the table. "Is there anything that you want to do or talk about, Danielle?"

Danielle thought for a moment. "Erm... can we go to the pier, the one where I almost died?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I've been avoiding going back there but I do need to face it sometime."

 

Janice parked up outside the entrance gates, killing the engine.

Danielle exhaled a nervous sigh. "Here goes," she muttered as they got out of the car and started walking slowly towards the partially opened gates.

"Take your time Danielle," Janice said, noticing Danielle briefly close her eyes.

Danielle looked back at the car. "A guy shouted hey when he saw me."

"What did you do?" Janice asked.

"I said you've gotta be kidding me! and then we ran along the pier, searching the south east corner for the key."

"Obviously you found the key."

"Yeah we did. I let him have it because he only had thirty seconds left on his countdown," Danielle said as she attempted to refrain from crying.

"Did you get the vest off?"

"It was programmed for my fingerprint." Danielle pointed to a sizeable burn mark in the concrete. "That's where the vest exploded. I told him to run and he did."

Janice directed a worried glance at Danielle, while she carefully strolled to where she was standing when Jack came running towards her. "Do you want to stop, Danielle?" Janice delicately probed.

"Not yet Janice, I need to do this."

Janice flashed a faint smiled at Danielle. "Take your time."

Danielle flinched as she mentally recalled her conversation with Jack. "The lieutenant was stood near that wall when Jack came running up to me, he asked me how my night was going."

"Do you remember what you said to Jack?"

Danielle released a fragile chuckle. "Yeah I do. I said to him I've got less than five minutes you might wanna save your small talk for your next partner.".

"Did he say anything else?"

"He was telling me about the earpiece having a thousand yard range and that Walker had to be that close to talk to me. Jack told me to trust him, and then spoke into the earpiece before pulling it out my ear." Danielle pointed to a slight dark blotch. “That's where Jack overloaded the earpiece. He warned Walker DON’T MESS WITH MY PARTNER! then he shot the earpiece causing it to overload." Janice noticed Danielle drying her eyes on her jacket sleeve. 

"We can stop Danielle."

Danielle shook her head. "I need to do this," she answered resolutely as she walked towards the edge of the embankment. "When Jack came with the key I only had twenty seconds left on my countdown. We got the bomb vest off and Jack threw it towards the water. As it exploded he put his arms around me and I clung to him, even went so far as to tell him that I'd try and repay the favor."

"I take it you haven’t done that yet," Janice said knowingly.

Danielle lowered her head. "Not yet," she answered remorsefully as the women started back towards the entrance.

Janice slowed her pace for a beat while Danielle pointed out something else from that night. "Lieutenant Cavanaugh was leaning against a squad car, he looked like he was about to have a heart attack."

"What about you Danielle?"

"I wanted to be sick but I held it in till I got to Jack's."

Janice spotted a dark fading crimson stain on a wall. "Do you know what that stain is from Danielle?"

Danielle smiled jubilantly. "That's where I shot the bastard in the balls."

"Why?"

"Because I promised him that I'd do it."

Janice smiled thoughtfully at Danielle. "How do you feel now that you've revisited the pier?"

"Peaceful and determined."

"Why do you feel determined, Danielle?"

Danielle laughed quietly. "Now that I've been to the place where my downward spiral started, I really want to get my life back on track. Starting with Aaron."

"No dealer, no cocaine."

"Yep and no more prostitution, last night was the last time."

"Is there anything you're going to do?" Janice asked, smiling positively at Danielle. 

"Tell Jack everything," Danielle sighed nervously. "He deserves to know the truth; I've been treating him like shit for no reason at all."

"It's natural to lash out at the people we care about, especially when we're hurting."

"I know it is and I've been told that I'll lose Jack unless something changes."

"Do you think they're right?" Janice probed delicately.

"Yeah they are."

"Is there any reason why you agree with them?"

Danielle released a satisfied sighed. "I've told him that the sex was a mistake."

"I take it; it doesn't feel like a mistake."

"Not anymore, I've fallen for him," Danielle admitted.

Janice looked at Danielle. "What are you going to tell Jack?"

"I have no idea how to tell him," Danielle muttered unconvincingly. "I don't think he wants an addict for a girlfriend."

"He may just surprise you, Danielle," Janice said as she looked at the clock. "We have five minutes; will you be coming next week?"

"Yeah but can I come on Wednesday instead?" Danielle asked.

"Sure, how does Wednesday at twelve sound?"

"That's fine, thanks. See you next week Janice."

*

Jack stood back while Danielle booked in, watching as she gently knocked on the receptionists window. "Hi, I’m getting my cast off," Danielle stated clearly.

"What’s your name?"

"Danielle Carter."

"Okay, waiting area is around the corner, the technician will call you."

Danielle and Jack made their way round to the waiting area. "Must be excited," Jack teased.

"Excited about what?"

"Getting your cast taken off."

"I guess I should be but I really don’t care."

A portly, yet stunted gentleman came out of the cutting room. "Danielle Carter," he called out.

Danielle got up, following the man into the room, watching with apprehension as he turned on a small circular saw beginning the cut around Danielle’s thumb carefully working his way up to her elbow, stopping when the incision ran top to bottom. He picked up a small chisel prying the pieces apart.

Danielle smiled curiously when she saw her pasty milk-like limb for the first time in weeks.  
"Milky bar kid has nothing on me," she quipped.

"Danielle I want you to wiggle your fingers and then make a fist." Danielle did as she had been directed. 

"How’s that?" she asked as she unclenched her fist.

"Very good, you won’t need any physical therapy sessions."

"Excellent, thank you," Danielle acknowledged as she left the room.

Jack handed her jacket to her. "That’s better," he remarked as she wore it properly.

"Yeah I guess it is," Danielle replied.

"Do you want some lunch, Danni?"

"Okay, where are we going?"

"My place, it’s gonna be busy everywhere this time of day."

*

Danielle took a swig of her beer. "That was lovely, Jack."

Jack smiled at her comment. "What did you do last night?"

"I stayed in."

"Really?" he questioned, attempting to hide his disbelief.

"Yeah I figured that it’d be better to rest before my hospital appointment and I don’t want to be around Aaron."

"What did you do?"

"With Aaron or last night, Jack?"

"Last night."

"Talked to Robbie and watched The Gallant And The Magnificent."

Jack chuckled. "What happened on the show?"

Danielle rolled her eyes at him. "I get it Jack, you don’t believe me."

"I do believe you Danni, I’m just curious that’s all."

"Alright, it was Beckford’s funeral; he finally did it after nineteen suicide attempts."

"But?" Jack asked.

"I think he’s gonna come back from the dead and so does Robbie."

"Beckford’s dead isn’t he?" Jack asked as he tried to hide his confusion.

"Yeah but the rumor is that Beckford is coming back from the dead to crash Star and Trent’s wedding and tell them that they’re twins who were separated at birth."

Jack released an uproarious laugh. "That’s ridiculous."

Danielle lowered her head when she heard. "With more to go. Will the memories die. I’m waiting." playing on the radio. Jack turned when he heard her sniveling. "Danni, are you okay?"

"No I’m not," Danielle answered lowly as Jack went to her; instinctively putting his arms around her while, she continued crying. "I haven’t heard that song sin…" she stopped.

"Since that night on the pier."

"Yeah," Danielle replied as she pulled away. "I’m gonna get some tissue before I have black eyes."

"Alright," Jack said while he watched Danielle make her way upstairs.

After a short while Jack went upstairs because he was concerned when Danielle hadn’t returned, as he reached his bedroom he stopped Danielle curled up on the bed, she was stroking the dog attempting to fight the ever flowing tears from falling. He got onto the bed, laying next to her, enveloping her into his protective embrace.

"What happened with Aaron?"

"Promise you won’t hate me Jack?"

"I won’t hate you," he whispered as he gently kissed the back of her neck, moving snuggly against her. 

Danielle released a depressed sigh. "I’ve been having sex with Aaron and getting coke as payment," she admitted despondently as she adjusted her position, enabling her to make eye contact with Jack.

"Oh Danielle, why?"

Danielle sniffed. "Because I was desperate and it seemed like a good idea."

"Not now?" Jack asked.

Danielle shook her moving in for a diffident kiss, noticing Jack’s delayed response. "What is it, Jack?" she queried.

"You think I hate you, Danni, I don’t."

Danielle smiled appreciatively at him. "So you don’t hate me?" she probed.

Jack softly kissed her forehead. "I don’t hate you but I do hate what your addiction is doing to you. It’s destroying you."

"I know it is," she admitted, moving in for a tender yet hurried kiss. 

"Wait me a minute," Jack garbled.

"Why Jack?" Danielle questioned, pulling away.

"Ray told me why you started that fight."

"The one in the office? That was months ago," Danielle said releasing a regretful sigh.

"I know that but he said you wanted someone else to hurt, why?"

Danielle sniffled. "Because I feel like I'm the only one who's hurting and no one understands what that's like."

"I do understand what it feels like to hurt and be alone," Jack empathized reassuringly.

Danielle shook her head. "No, Jack, you don't understand," she softly replied.

Jack soothingly caressed her lank hair as she rested her head against his chest, gradually drifting away under his watchful eye. He became conscious of her sense of peace as she slept, before going to sleep himself.

 

"How are you feeling, Danni?" Jack asked sleepily.

"A little better," Danielle replied, stifling a yawn.

"Do you want any breakfast?"

"Yeah, I'll try something."

"What do you want?"

"Oh surprise me," Danielle chuckled. "I'm gonna jump in the shower," she added.

Jack kissed her on the cheek. "Alright," he said, before getting out of bed and making his way downstairs.

Danielle waited for until Jack's footsteps faded before getting up.

 

"I needed that," Danielle declared as slinked over to Jack.

Jack smiled lovingly at her. "Needed what? The shower or the sleep?" he questioned.

"Both," Danielle replied as she slipped her arms around his waist. "I'm sorry Jack," she whispered.

"For what?"

"Been harsh when you said you understood. I shouldn't have been so dismissive last night."

"It's fine Danni. Now how about eating something."

Danielle pulled away and sat down; she poured a splash of milk onto her cereal, nibbling on a small spoonful.

A few minutes passed when Danielle finished. "Damn it, I used too much milk," she remarked unhappily.

"It doesn't matter Danni, the main thing is that you’ve eaten."

"Yeah I guess. What are we doing today?"

"Work, we have that new case remember?"

"No but I do have shit for brains," Danielle muttered.

"Yes you do," Jack answered. "Now let’s go."

*

Danielle was working in one of the vacant evidence rooms; she was going over her paperwork for their latest case. "The hell?" she mumbled as she tried to remember when several of the searches and interviews had taken place, as well as comprehend why the case had been classed as deviant.

 

"What are we going to do about Carter?" Ray probed.

Jack released a frustrated sigh. "I don’t know man."

"How’s her work, Jack?"

"Not good, she can’t work as efficiently as she used to. I think that she’s been doing coke in the office."

"I thought you might think that Jack. Maybe she’s doing it in the bathroom," Ray considered.

A gentle knock on the door interrupted the men’s conversation. "Come in," Ray hollered.

"Detective Hale, we’ve got a lead," Burch stated nervously.

"Go, we’ll finish this later," Ray directed.

Jack took a few moments to find Danielle’s hiding place. "Let’s go."

"Go where, Jack?" Danielle asked.

"Got a sighting in Forest Hill."

Danielle glanced at Jack. "I don’t understand this case."

"What don’t you understand?"

Danielle smiled thoughtfully at Jack. "How we got this case in the first place. It’s not deviant."

"The perps signature is what makes this case deviant. That’s what makes it ours."

"Thanks Jack, my mind’s a little hazy."

*

"Jack," Danielle shouted, picking up a shell casing with a pair of tweezers.

"What?" he asked.

"I need a bag for this," she replied while looking out of the window, spotting the suspect walking towards the house. Without hesitating or considering the potential danger, she quickly made her way out front.

A tall dark haired man approached the patrol cop, who was standing on the street quickly and indiscriminately firing two rounds into the young man’s shoulder, wounding him. The shooter smiled at his victim while he used his radio to whimper for help, before continuing towards the house pausing for a split second when the front door opened. 

"DROP YOUR WEAPON!" Danielle commanded as she made her way down the steps, her full attention on the gunman.

A moment later a small fire burst escaped the perp’s 9mm forcing Danielle to shoot back before collapsing in a heap at the bottom of the steps.

¬ Jack threw the bomb vest towards the water, instinctively putting his arms around Danielle as it exploded in mid-air.

"Thank you," she uttered heavily as she clung to him. 

"You're welcome," he replied as she stared intensely at him.¬

Ray and Jack came sprinting out of the house. "CARTER!" Jack screamed, taking three steps at a time. When he reached Danielle, he instantly noticed the blood, cradling her in his arms applying continuous pressure to her hip as he attempted to stem the flow. "Stay with me, Danni," Jack pleaded.

Ray contacted dispatch informing them of the situation. "This is five-Lincoln-one. We need medical assistance at Lopez and Castaneda. Officer's down, repeat, officer's down." He quickly ended the call, strolling across to where Jack and Danielle were. "Where'd she get hit?" he inquired.

"Hip, I think. She's losing a lot of blood Ray," Jack spoke with anguish.

Danielle attempted to speak. "Inv..."

"Hold on Carter," Ray demanded.

"Inci..." she mouthed.

"Help's coming," Jack reassuringly stated.

"Ble." Danielle somehow managed to utter the final letters before losing consciousness.

"Thank god," Ray sighed when he heard the sirens of the approaching ambulances.

The paramedics took a stretcher with them when they went to Danielle. "When did she lose consciousness?"

"A few minutes ago," Jack answered.

"What happened?"

"We were inside looking for evidence, she came outside and was shot. I think she got hit in the hip."

The paramedics carefully lifted Danielle onto the stretcher, placing an oxygen mask over her face, wheeling her to the ambulance. "I'm going with Carter," Jack stated.

"Alright man, I'll talk to you later."

Jack sprinted to the ambulance. "Hey wait up!" he hollered.

"Yeah?"

"I'm going with her," Jack said defiantly as he hopped in the back with Danielle and the technician.

*

Danielle was rushed into the emergency operating room, sobbing with discomfort as the doctors checked her injury and vital signs. The doctor made a note on her chart. 

"What is it?" the fresh-faced intern queried.

"I've treated her before," Doctor Raddox admitted. "She has high levels of cocaine in her system; if we perform surgery the anesthetic could kill her."

"We have to take that chance doctor."

"Absolutely not."

 

"Detective Hale," Doctor Raddox said when he spotted Jack.

"How is she?" Jack asked, worried.

"Not good. We can't operate on her."

"Why not?"

"She has too much cocaine in her system, surgery could kill her."

Jack sighed anxiously. "I understand."

"I have to ask you, did you know about Danielle's baby?" Doctor Raddox delicately probed. 

Jack's eyes widened in antipathy at the doctor's question. 

"She's had a miscarriage."

"Is that why there was so much blood?" Jack calmly questioned the doctor.

"Yes," Doctor Raddox replied. "I've got to get back to her; I'll keep you informed of her condition."

 

"Jack, how is she?" Ray enquired.

"Not good. They won’t operate, she's had a miscarriage, Ray," Jack softly spoke, attempting to hide his pain.

"Some one off, Jack," Ray reacted angrily.

Jack glanced at his boss. "She was only five weeks in, probably didn’t even know yet."

Ray released a worried sigh. "Who's the father then, if it's not you?"

"Could be Aaron, but the baby is nothing to do with me sir."

"Did you ask for an HIV test?"

Jack flashed a curios gaze at his boss. "What do I need one for? We only had sex once and we used protection but that was over six months ago."

"I meant for Carter," Ray stated.

"I never thought to ask."

Doctor Raddox emerged from the operating room, discarding his bloody rubber gloves in a trash can. "Detective Hale, we've managed to stem the flow. Do you want to go in?"

Jack headed for the room, briefly pausing when he heard Ray talking to the doctor.

"She's sleeping, let her rest," Doctor Raddox mentioned.

 

Jack sat on the edge of the bed watching Danielle as she slept attempting to figure everything out, Danielle abruptly woke up disturbing his train of thought as she cried out. "Jack, it's painful," she whimpered.

"I should go," he offered.

"Stay."

"Why should I?"

"Because I need you," Danielle proclaimed contritely.

"You need help, Danni, not me," Jack pointed out refusing to fight his anguish any longer. "The doctors couldn't operate but they have stopped the bleeding."

Danielle raised an eyebrow. "I still have the bullet inside me?" she asked. Jack simply nodded his head.

Jack's prolonged silence began to worry and perturb Danielle. "What is it, Jack?"

"I'll wait for the doctor to tell you, Danni."

"Tell me!" Danielle demanded.

Jack lowered his head. "You had a miscarriage," he murmured.

"Plan B didn't work," Danielle wailed.

"What?" Jack asked, flashing a contemptuous glare at Danielle. "I don't do bareback," he angrily recalled.

"I remember Jack. I was desperate for coke and I had no choice. I didn't want to do it!"

"Yes you did have a choice!" Jack yelled, turning when Ray walked in.

"Hey calm down. She's been through enough Jack."

"I've had enough of this. I'm through with her," Jack stated as he left the room.

 

Ray handed Danielle a tissue. "He didn't mean any of that Carter, he's just..." Ray stopped.

"Pissed off," Danielle said finishing her boss' sentence.

Ray nodded his head. "Did he tell you about the baby?" he enquired gently.

Danielle sniffled. "Yeah he did."

"I'm not sure how to ask this Carter."

"What?" Danielle asked.

"Do you know who the father was?"

"Yes," Danielle whispered.

"Jack?" Ray probed.

"No, the baby was Aaron's." Jack re-entered the room. "Knew it," he muttered.

Ray looked at them, leaving the room to give them space. "I'll see you back at the office, Jack."

 

"What's gonna happen Jack?"

Jack shrugged his shoulders, sighing dejectedly. "I don't know," he replied sitting on the edge of the bed, holding Danielle's hand.

"I screwed up," Danielle confessed weakly.

"Yes you did," Jack said, smiling hopefully at her confession. "Invincible?" he questioned.

Danielle flashed a fragile smile. "I guess I'm not invincible after all."

"No you're not, nobody is."

"I know," Danielle tittered. "Hey I've been thinking."

"What?"

Danielle grimaced as she adjusted her position. "I need to get off coke for good and the only way I can do that is by going back into rehab."

"Danni, why now?" Jack probed, his curiosity piqued.

"I guess getting shot has given me a wake up call that I've needed for a while. Losing the baby made me realize that it's time to face up to reality and to the addiction."

"That's good," Jack responded positively.

"It is. Hey will you tell the Lieutenant for me, Jack?"

"Yeah I will. Listen I gotta go but I promise I'll come back later on."

"Bring my ipod and some candy with you," Danielle requested.

"Sure."

*

First week

Danielle heaved an uncertain sigh. "Here goes," she muttered.

Jack put his arm around her as the entered the rehab facility. "You can do this," he said reassuringly.

Marcus came out of his office when he saw Danielle and Jack queuing at reception. "Are you ready this time Danielle?" he inquired.

"Yes."

"I'll show you up to your room, you can come too Jack," Marcus said.

Marcus spotted the wires poking out of Danielle’s pocket. "You know the rules Danielle."

"Let me keep my ipod," Danielle begged.

"You know the rules," he reaffirmed.

Danielle smiled innocently at the man. "Please, Marcus, I really need it."

"Alright," Marcus surrendered as he left the room that would be Danielle's home for the next four weeks.

"Hey, when do I have to leave?" Jack asked.

"In fifteen minutes," Marcus shouted.

Danielle turned her ipod on, sharing the earphones with Jack. "This song has got me through some real tough times," she admitted with a sadness. 

"You take me in no questions asked. You strip away the ugliness that surrounds me (who are you?)" Danielle tenderly held Jack's arm while her favorite line played out. "This line always makes me think of you and everything that you’ve done for me."

"That's sweet, Danni," Jack acknowledged, wrapping his arms around her enticing her into a temporary goodbye hug. 

A few minutes later Marcus returned. "You'll have to go Jack, sorry man."

"I understand," he said as he left, briefly turning to Danielle. "If you feel like you can't do this, phone me and I'll come and get you."

Danielle smiled at Jack's offer. "I need to do this Jack. I have to do this but I will phone you when I can't sleep or there's an earthquake."

"Good luck Danni," he whispered.

 

Second week

"Back again," Cassie stated when she entered Danielle's room.

Danielle sat up when she heard her friend's voice. "You still good for those skittles?" she asked.

Cassie handed Danielle a small carrier bag filled with various candies. "What brought you back here?"

"Getting shot and losing my baby," Danielle said remorsefully.

Cassie's eyes became wide with shock. "Your kid was taken off you?"

Danielle shook her head. "I had a miscarriage, didn't even know I was pregnant," she choked on her words and tears. "Why are you back here?"

Cassie smiled ruefully. "I thought just one time for old time's sake won't hurt me and now I'm back here. Court order, rehab or prison, rehab is the easier of the two."

"Yeah," Danielle said as she lay back and stared at the ceiling.

 

Third week

Danielle was sitting in Marcus' office staring out of the window. "I miss him," she whispered.

"You miss who?" Marcus probed.

"Jack."

"Why are you missing him?"

Danielle sighed. "I don't know, I guess I just am because I'm so used to been with him and around him that I've started missing him."

"You miss him, so you have feelings for him."

"I guess I do but I can't let go of what I don’t have," Danielle confessed.

Marcus glanced at Danielle. "Do you know how he feels about you?"

"No but I do know that he doesn't want an addict for a girlfriend."

Marcus flicked through a small book, reading silently from a dog-eared page. "We usually say that you shouldn't have a relationship for two years after you’ve left rehab."

"Two years?" Danielle asked incredulously.

"Yes but in some cases it can happen much quicker than that."

Danielle rolled her eyes. "So I've got to tell Jack how I feel when I get out of here. Should be fun," she remarked with uncertainty.

 

Fourth week

Danielle was lounging on the bench furthest away from the center. She was writing something in a journal occasionally tearing out pages when she could not get her words right. "Damn it!" she cursed throwing a balled up piece of paper into a trash can.

Cassie approached Danielle. "What you doing?"

Danielle looked up from her writing. "Nothing," she said as she closed the journal, clipping the pen to the spirals.

"It didn't look like nothing."

Danielle smiled softly. "I leave today and I have to find a way of telling someone how I really feel and it's hard because I think he might reject me."

"The best thing you can do is to be honest with him but also say I shouldn't have told you that and then see what he says," Cassie advised.

Danielle got up. "Thanks Cassie," she said before walking away.

"Where are you going?" Cassie hollered.

"To pack," Danielle replied hopefully.

* 

Danielle tapped loudly on the heavy mahogany door; smiling as Grace greeted her with a warm hug as she stepped inside. "Would you like something to drink, Danielle?" Grace offered.

"Soda would be good," Danielle accepted. "Hey, is Jack here yet?" she asked nervously.

"He's been here all day, helping me and now he's watching TV with Ray and the girls."

"okay."

"Dinner will be another 10 minutes," Grace stated.

 

Grace entered the family room. "Dinner's ready," she announced, heading back to the kitchen to dish up six servings of Danielle’s favorite meal.

"Danielle, why did you go to rehab?" Lily questioned.

"Lily!" Ray and Grace exclaimed in unison.

"Its okay guys, I don't mind," Danielle said.

Jack shot a concerned glance at Danielle. "Are you sure?" he enquired.

Danielle smiled thankfully at her friends concern. "I'm sure."

"Why did you go to rehab?" Lily repeated her question.

"I went to rehab because I screwed up. I was using cocaine to help me deal with my problems rather than facing them."

"Did you learn anything?" Lily asked.

Danielle smiled at the 12 year old's questions. "All I know is this; you don't confront your demons and defeat them. You confront them, then you confront them, then you confront them some more, every single day."

"That's nice Carter. Can we eat now," Ray impatiently asked.

Danielle nodded her head, shoveling a forkful of pasta into her mouth, briefly noticing the affectionate smile on Jack's face.

"You haven't said anything about the food."

"Jack, leave it," Ray cautioned.

"It's nice; it tastes like my dad's recipe."

"It is your dad's recipe, Danielle, but we had to ask him to translate it into English," Grace admitted.

Jack sighed contentedly. "I asked him for it when you were in rehab."

"Did anyone ask where I was?" Danielle cautiously inquired.

"No but I think they knew," Ray replied.

"I'm a little curious about the recipe," Grace said.

"What do you want to know?" Danielle asked.

"What does it mean in Italian?"

"Pasta del pomodoro e del formaggio," Danielle said with a slight accent, chuckling to herself when she saw how impressed Jack was with her language skills.

 

Jack softly tapped Danielle's arm. "What are you doing tonight?"

"Not going home," Danielle stated anxiously.

"Carter, what's wrong?" Ray probed.

"Aaron was hanging around my building when I left."

"We can go to my place if you want to," Jack offered.

"Yeah, that'd be good, thanks Jack."

Ray popped a celery stick in his mouth although right now he desperately wanted a cigar. "I'll post an officer outside your building; find something to charge him with. Should it come to that," he stated.

"Thank you sir," Danielle acknowledged as she exited the room.

"No problem, I'll see you two tomorrow."

"Night," Jack said politely, following Danielle to the car.

*

Jack let Danielle in before him. The dog gingerly approached Danielle sniffing her ankle, as though she was a stranger. She crouched down and gently stroked him behind his ear. "I missed you boy," she teased.

“"You didn't miss me?" Jack asked although he knew that she had missed him desperately.

"More than you'll ever know," she thankfully replied as she sat on the steps, watching Jack take two bottles of water from the fridge. "What?" Jack asked, returning with their drinks.

"It's nothing," Danielle uttered happily, as Jack took his rightful place, beside her.

"Just tell me Danni."

Danielle exhaled heavily. "I'm in love with you, and you really didn't need to know that. I should go." Jack slipped his arm around her waist, drawing her closer to him. "Actually, Danni, I'm glad you told me."

"You are?"

Jack smiled at her for a beat before speaking. "I'm in love with you too but I didn’t want to say anything because I didn't know if you felt the same way."

"Really, so what are we going to do Jack?" Danielle asked unsurely.

Jack leant in for a tentative kiss. "See where this takes us," he whispered confidently as their mouths merged for a taste of things to come, waiting a few moments before pulling away.

"I've got a problem," Danielle whispered.

Jack tucked an errant curl behind her ear. "What it is sweetie?"

"What are we going to do about work?"

Jack tittered sympathetically. "We'll tell Ray on Monday, he'll understand."

"Alright," Danielle said, placing her hand on his face teasing him with soft kisses trying not to laugh when his stubble grazed against her lips.

Jack fleetingly pulled away. "We can't stay here all weekend."

"No we can't," Danielle agreed as he helped her to her feet.

Danielle looked around the familiar yet strange master bedroom. "The bed's been moved," she noted with indifference.

"I know it has, I moved it."

Danielle moved to the side of the bed, laughing uproariously as she flopped onto the neatly arranged queen sized bed. "Still as comfortable as ever," she remarked blissfully.

Jack kicked his boots off and lay down beside her. "You know what I missed..." he started.

"What?"

"Having you around."

Danielle moved closer to Jack resting her hand on his stomach. "I missed you too," she said sweetly, kissing his exposed bicep.

Jack turned onto his side smiling affectionately as he softly stroked the side of Danielle's face. "Can we stay here forever?" Danielle asked quietly.

"Yeah we can," Jack replied.

 

\---Danielle adjusted her position, using her elbows to prop herself up. "Jack, am I gonna have to spell out what I want?" she questioned seductively shaking her long blonde curly hair. 

Jack instantly knew exactly what she was alluding to. "I was waiting for you," he said, reaching into the nightstand for a condom. He turned and watched as Danielle slinked out of her baby blue summer dress.

"I let you do the honors," Danielle nostalgically remarked, her breathing became ragged with anticipation watching expectantly as Jack stripped and rolled the thin casing onto himself.

Danielle pulled Jack down onto her, kissing him on the shoulder as he fixed his position. "Be gentle, Jack, my hip's still a little tender," Danielle muttered apprehensively.

"I will," Jack replied as he slowly entered her, teasingly taking each breast in turn, paying extra attention to her nipples, licking and sucking on the ever-hardening buds causing her to cry out for more, chuckled sensually as she arched her back to his every movement.

Danielle wrapped her arms around Jack's back, turning so that she was on top. "This is better," she declared as she began rocking in rhyme with him, smiling as they gradually came together. A short beat passed when Danielle rested her head on his chest, her hair lightly tickling him as she listened to his heartbeat regaining its regularity returning.--- 

 

Jack and Danielle were gazing amorously at each other. "How was that?" he asked.

"Perfect," Danielle replied honestly.

"Love makes everything change from black and white to color." Jack blissfully assured.

Danielle smiled at the sentiment. "That's sweet baby," she purred while drawing invisible love hearts on his sweat soaked pecs.

"While you were in rehab I did some thinking," Jack said in a confessional manner.

"About what Jack?"

"About us."

Danielle licked and sucked on Jack's exposed neck. "What about us?" she questioned huskily, gasping when she felt his hand brush against her side as he moved it to her waist. "I think we should live together."

"Actually Jack, that would make sense," Danielle admitted. "I do spend most of my time here as it is any way," she finished.

"I'm not rushing you Danni, but when do you want to bring you stuff over?"

"How about tomorrow, baby?" Danielle whispered as slumber began to get the better of her.

"Tomorrow," Jack whispered, holding his best friend and now his lover as she dozed and dreamt peacefully yet silently in his arms.

*

"Lieutenant are you busy?" Danielle asked apprehensively.

"What can I do for you two?" Ray queried.

Jack suppressed as sigh as he dropped into one of the comfy chairs in front of his boss's desk. "We're living together," he said wearily.

Ray raised an eyebrow. "You mean as a couple?"

"Yes," Danielle said. "It's the right thing for both of us."

Ray suckled on a worn down celery stick. "I've suspected for sometime that this could happen."

"What's the problem sir?" Jack probed.

Ray sighed. "It's not a problem as such, Jack."

Jack glared at his boss. "Really Ray?"

Danielle looked at Ray and Jack. "He wants to know if I'm ready for a relationship, Jack."

"Are you ready, Carter?" Ray asked, concerned.

"Yeah I am. After everything, that I have been through recently and put you guys through I am ready. All I've wanted since that night on the pier is to be with Jack and I also need to find ways of avoiding my addiction."

Ray fired a quizzical glance at Danielle. "What else are you going to be doing Carter?"

Danielle sighed contently. "I've signed up for the soccer team, hopefully I'll get a game eventually but the training will be fun. I'm giving up clubs and until I feel ready to drink I'll only be drinking coffee and soft drinks."

"That's good," Ray acknowledged.

Jack couldn’t help laughing at his boss and friend. "See I told you things were changing for the better."

"I know you did Jack, but fortunately, you can't speak for Carter."

Danielle stood up, quickly heading for the door. "I'll leave you to it."

"Danni, wait up," Jack said loudly.

Ray smiled at his charges. "Go on, get out of here. Carter, any problems don't hesitate to tell one of us."

"I won't sir," she promised.

*

"Hi Janice," Danielle said brightly, greeting her counselor and now sponsor.

"How are you feeling Danielle?" Janice asked.

A faint smile formed on Danielle's mouth. "Good, happy for the first time in months."

"I'm pleased for you. What's making you happy?"

"Being clean and being in love."

Janice raised an eyebrow. "In love? With Jack?" she questioned.

"Yes. I told him on Saturday night after my homecoming dinner."

"Who was the dinner with?"

"The Lieutenant's family and Jack. We had dinner, cheese and tomato pasta, my favorite and then just talked for a while. We left around 9:15"

"You and Jack?"

"Yeah. Aaron was hanging around my building when I left so I spent the night with Jack. It was nice."

"Danielle, why was it nice?"

"I finally told him how I really feel, that I'm in love with him. He feels exactly the same way about me, which I never realized. We also decided to live together."

"That is fantastic news."

 

"Danielle as your sponsor I have to ask you these questions."

"Okay, fire away."

"Are you using drugs right now?"

"Nope! I've been clean for almost seven weeks now."

"How do you feel about random drug testing?"

"Absolutely fine."

"Have you attended any NA meetings since you left rehab?"

"My first one is this Friday."

2Thank you, Danielle. Not everyone like answering those questions."

Danielle released a faint chuckled. "It's okay Janice, its procedure, I understand."

Janice looked at her watch. "Time's almost up. Is there anything else you want to say?"

"Yeah," Danielle said pointing to a large poster with the text All the way along, I thought I was normal and the rest of the world had gone mad stuck onto the far wall. "Where'd you get that poster from?"

"It was a gift from a former client."

"That quote is true," Danielle remarked. "Bye Janice," she added, exiting the room.

*

Harry, Ray and Jack had gathered in Danielle office at her request. "Thanks for coming guys," she acknowledged.

"What's the problem?" Harry asked.

"As you know I meet with my sponsor as part of my recovery and from time to time I have to have random drug tests as well as going to NA meetings."

Curiosity crashed over Ray's features. "Carter, what are you trying to say?"

"I want Harry to do my drug tests and for him to tell you, Janice and Jack the results."

"Are you sure?" Jack asked.

"Yeah I am."

Ray and Harry left the office. Jack gently caressed Danielle's face. "Why the drug tests?"

"They're part of the recovery process and I trust Harry."

Jack perched on the desk. "What do you want to do tonight?" he questioned.

Danielle sighed softly. "I don't know. I guess we could take the dog for a walk and then watch the late movie when we get back."

"Sounds good."

"I detect a 'but' Jack," Danielle playfully scoffed.

"Well I was going to cook and surprise you with something."

Danielle’s curiosity had been piqued by the notion of something that was either going to be a good thing or a bad thing. "Surprise me with what?"

2Wait until tonight," he teased.

*

Jack unfastened the dog's leash, letting him roam free on the deck. "Dinner's ready," he noted as the timer pinged. 

"Perfect timing," Danielle chuckled appreciatively.

Danielle instinctively put her cutlery down when Jack crouched down in front of her. He opened a small vintage velvet box that contained an antiquated gold diamond and ruby encrusted engagement ring. "What are you doing Jack?2 she nervously enquired.

"This was my grandma's and I'm proposing."

Danielle sniffled at the offer and sentiment. "I'm not sure Jack although the ring is stunning."

"Sure about what?" he asked.

"Marriage seems like such a huge step and I'm not ready for that just yet," Danielle admitted, attempting to mask the rejection.

"Okay," Jack said. "We can always have a long engagement, a very long engagement," he suggested.

"Can I think about it?" Danielle asked while Jack slid the ring onto her finger, kissing her dotingly on the lips.

A few moments later, they went to the lounge, leaving the dirty dishes on the table. They were curled up on the couch, laughing at the latest wacky storyline on Danielle’s favorite show. "Told ya," Danielle avowed.

Jack glanced at her. "Told me what?"

"That Beckford was going to come back from the dead and ruin the wedding."

Jack took Danielle's hand, staring at the ring. "Have you thought about what were doing?"

"Yeah, I have," Danielle answered brightly. 

"Well?"

"I want a very long engagement Jack. I just want to take everything one day at a time and can we get it tightened because it feels a little slack and I really don't want to lose it because I understand how much this means to you."

"Of course we can, sweetie," he said as he began to kiss her softly on the lips, noticing the hurry in Danielle's response.

"I feel like I need to distract myself," Danielle admitted sadly, as they broke apart.

"How come?"

"I've just got an urge to go out and do a couple of line of coke just for the sake of it."

Jack put his arm around her. "Danni, it's not the answer."

"I know it's not Jack but I wish I didn't get unshakable urges to go there just one more time."

Jack shot a worried glance at Danielle. "It's going to be hard but you'll get through it and when were together we'll do enough to keep the urges at bay."

"Yeah I know its hard Jack but I'm scared that at anytime I'm going to fall back into bad habits. I don't want that I want to be normal, be me again although the addiction has changed me."

"How has it changed you?" 

Danielle scoffed quietly. "I don't know but I feel different somehow, like something inside me that defines me is missing and that scares me."

Jack twiddled her hair between his fingers. "One day at a time," he whispered.

-end-

**Author's Note:**

> That was The Fic That Drank The Humber Dry :) [private joke]
> 
> How ironic, I began writing this on a Wednesday and I finish writing it on a Wednesday, albeit 10 months later. Yes, I am that much of a geek that I had to find this out :) 
> 
> I am not an expert on any of the subjects dealt with in this story, nor do I claim to be. I just had an idea for an aftermath response and the result, after much deliberation was drug addiction and some of the things that can also happen when someone becomes an addict especially after a traumatic experience like what Danielle had in the series finale 'Fifteen Minutes Of Flame'.
> 
> In addition, I do not speak Italian. I speak Irish Gaelic, English and Urdu; the translation of ‘cheese and tomato pasta’ from English to Italian is from dictionary.com's Italian translator and as well as being loose may also be inaccurate. The site do clearly state that.
> 
> Finally, before I forget. Have to say a big 'thank you' to Tamara for test reading the fic for me before I posted it. Much appreciated.


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